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lying to myself?

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by Samthing, Sep 27, 2017.

  1. Samthing

    Regular Member

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    So basically the thing is I had a girlfriend who affectionately referred to me as the boyfriend and I just sort of played along. I've tried binding recently to see if I'd prefer it. I keep thinking to myself that I'm trans and I'm actually meant to be a guy but then I'll have days where I think am I just doing it to be different for the sake of standing out? Am I actually just lying to myself because I want to be unique and different and be anyone other than myself?
     
  2. dyl pickle

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    Well, if you have been considering yourself genderqueer since before that, that's already pretty unique and different, so that might not make much sense, right? Sometimes our doubts can be flawed and therefore show they're invalid :slight_smile:

    Before I decided how I feel is male, I identified as genderqueer as well, and sometimes a demi-guy (I suppose you could say it's like being in between a guy and neutral). That doesn't mean it's the same for you however. In the end, you need to trust your feelings and attempt to understand them, even if it takes a while, which it might. I still have times where I doubt myself and wonder if I'm trans at all in any way, or if I'm just doing this to have something to blame my depression and anxiety on and to seem unique and special for attention - so you're not alone there. I always come back to the same conclusion though - that how I feel is how I feel, and I need to trust myself. Otherwise, I'd be in a constant loop of self-doubt, and that would drive me insane.

    Even if you change your mind later in life, so what? All that matters is that you feel happy and comfortable.
     
  3. swimmingfly

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    i went through the same kind of thing until i realized that i feel 100% male all the time. i still doubt myself especially because i'm only out to like 3 people. I always go back to the same conclusion as dyl pickle and that seems to be relatively common in the trans community. i'm sure you'll figure it out :slight_smile:
     
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  4. Samthing

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    I'm really struggling with it. Some days I'll have thoughts where I'm totally sure I'm trans. Other days I'm hating myself cause I feel like I'm just attention seeking. I can't tell anyone cause they will tell me I'm wrong and that I'm just self conscious about my body. I don't know if I'm trying too hard to be someone else or if this is really me
     
  5. swimmingfly

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    i know you'll figure it out dude :slight_smile: if you need to talk to someone i'm here
     
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