So, I spent most of my adult life convincing myself I was straight, even though attraction to men came up occasionally (I'm now in my 40's). Then in the past 3-4 years I have come to accept that I am bisexual. I have an instant reaction to a beautiful woman, and find my self attracted to them. With men, most of the time I become attracted to men I know more than having a physical reaction to a good looking guy I see. From a sexual point of view, I have been married over 15 years, and sexually active with women since my early 20's. I have never been with a man, but I do own a dildo and regularly use it for masturbation - for anal penetration and also to suck when I'm fantasising about men. Over the years my fantasies have moved from being a mix of female and male fantasies, to being almost exclusively fantasies of being with a man - the idea of bottoming, giving oral, pleasuring and being dominated by a strong masculine man. For or reasons beyond sexuality, sex with my wife is limited in our current living arrangements, so recently it's been some months since we had sex. Until last weekend... And now is where the problem/confusion has come for me. When we were having sex, it took a long time for me to get an erection (never a problem until now and not a problem when masturbating). Then when I did, I just couldn't get fully aroused during the sex and thought I would never cum. In the end, I imagined I was being bottomed by a guy and focused on that alone. Then I came very quickly after that. So I'm posting here to see if anyone else has ever had this experience or if anyone has any thoughts on what this might mean for me?