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Ladies, Would you consider dating a younger woman?

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by Linkmaste, Feb 23, 2017.

  1. Linkmaste

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    No, I don't mean a 50 year old dating a 18 year old.

    But, I mean if I was 25 (pst, I am 25) and you were in your thirties or even early forties, would you consider dating that young?

    I had fling with this girl around 20 and being 25, I could see how mentally different we were. She was going to college, I finished and going through a divorce. Just...I feel like I have no connection to any woman around my actual age or younger.

    I went on a date with this older woman around 31 and it was actually nice. She was civil, didn't want to take a million selfies or get wasted or talk about drama.

    Okay, my story aside, would the older ladies on this thread care to comment or you younger ladies, would you date an older woman?
     
  2. Ohmydayzz

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    I'm 37, i set my dating preferences to 30-48. I did chat to a lady who was 31 and she parties a little too hard for me.

    What probably would turn me off about a much younger woman is them wanting kids. My kids are 20 and 17, my family is complete. I'd support a partner who wanted a baby but I don't want to be a parent again.
     
  3. Linkmaste

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    Even at 31, there are partiers?! Gosh, I must have the soul of 35 year old...I can't even stomach a night in a club anymore. I think it's crazy night when I go to a bar and eat chicken wings...MEDIUM.

    Jokes aside, that would be an issue if the younger partner would like to have children. Myself, I don't care for having kids so it puts me at an awkward spot. But, I'd rather not have any than have a child and regret it.
     
  4. Bluenote

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    Linkmaste,

    Speaking as a mid-50s newly discovered lesbian, I would consider it. I feel like I'm about the same mentally as I was in my mid-30s, so in the abstract, I could definitely be attracted to a woman in her 30s, assuming the feeling was mutual. There is a difference between a date and thinking about spending my life with someone.

    Although, I've always thought, "Ugh, creeper" if there is too much of an age difference. The crazy thing is that I'm here on this forum with my newly discovered attraction to women because of a beautiful 30 something who blew the lid off of my repressed homosexuality- but I did back away thinking, yikes, I'm the creeper! Having personally experienced the attraction, it didn't feel wrong or strange although society would look on it that way.
     
  5. YeahpIdk

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    I think thirty-somethings would definitely be into dating twenty-five year olds. I mean, I'm hoping they do. I'm in the middle of twenty-five and thirty, and I only go about three years younger, whereas I would go five years older than me...maybe even push it to ten if it was the right person. Also, if I was thirty, someone five years younger might not bother me.

    Like you noted, there's a huge difference between someone who's twenty and twenty-five. Obviously sometimes there's not and it works, but most twenty-somethings are freshly adult, out wobbling around on their little adult legs and figuring out the world. Many Twenty-fives are out of college, in a career, and looking to be a bit adventurous and settled. SOME, definitely not all...but that's way more on par with a thirty-something than going younger.

    Way too many written numbers...haha.
     
  6. Margaret

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    I'm 24, and I plan on only dating my age or older because I do want a family someday and I'm well aware most say like 21-23 year olds aren't ready to settle down and I feel like I am.
     
  7. Linkmaste

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    Very fair point. Although, I feel like I have no adult skills whatsoever. I'm taking this woman out for dinner next week and I feel pretty nervous heh. I hope I do a good job to impress her, I kinda like her.

    I can understand when you're older like fortys or fifties the attraction to the thirty or late twenty year olds-the ages kinda blend after 23/24 IMO. Some people mature more, others have youthful personalities that I can appreciate.

    For flings, I think it's okay for the vast variety of ages. I mean I have considered going going all the way up to forty if I was feeling adventurous for a fling or a fun time. But for a real relationship? I'm actually not sure what age I would seriously cap myself at.

    Buttttt wha'ts what fun dating is for right? To see what you like and what you don't like. I already wasted my seven years with a man. I'm not gunna waste another single minute of it.
     
  8. afgirl

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    Wow, I'm feeling ancient on this thread, but..... anyway. Yes, I would date younger, but not too much younger. I am in my forties, and will date 30-somethings, although even early 30s would probably be too much. I'm not sure. Try not to focus on the numbers, but the person. When it becomes generational and you can't relate to the same things, I think that's when it really becomes an issue. Ironically, I really don't want to date older at all.
     
  9. 1Tiny0wl

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    I am 30, For me it depends mostly on the person and what we have in common. If there is a connection etc..though I am usually attracted to women that are only a few years older or a few years younger.
     
  10. Peterpangirl

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    In terms of considering a relationship, I think the person would have to be not too much younger, otherwise I would feel like a creep, and there would inevitably be less in common. The possibility someone would want children at some point would be a real issue for me, as I have had my own children and don't want to go through all that again, much as I love my children. Also, I confess I am rather attracted to slightly older women...
     
  11. BrookeVL

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    I'm not quite thirty yet, but I sure would. I'm NOWHERE near the level of maturity of the average 30 year old, I'm probably closer to 20 somethings in a lot of ways. Also, being trans means I can't be as picky, especially pre-op.

    But mostly the maturity/life experience thing. Being in college full time and working part time, me and a 22 year old probably have much more in common compared to a 30 year old who has a career, their own house, makes a livable salary, and is looking to find the "one" and settle down.
     
  12. Winter Storm

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    Although, I'm married and not looking. I would consider someone younger, possibly late 20's. But it depends on maturity levels. I think, I would be more concerned that they would see me as too old.
     
  13. latenlife lez

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    I am 42- and I am seeing a 22 year old-

    There are challenges- like when I make a reference to something in pop culture that she has not lived through- and I get-- what is that---LOL

    That is a little challenge- though. I find the big challenge is not dealing with age but how well she knows herself and I know myself and how we have handled past incidents in our lives. From reconciling childhoods (and some would say she is still in her's because of her age) to finding out what makes us tick, there are many days when I am so far ahead- because I have been doing counseling off and since she was born (and I was in college).

    To stay in relationship she has to attend counseling of her own- and she would be the first one to tell you that she needs it- like all of us there are demons/skeletons and other things in our past. I have to have patience for her to discover things on her own.

    She has to walk through things most 20 somethings don't- like impending menopause- being responsible to get children on school bus-- listening to an older person lament about the good old days--LOL

    My greatest fear is the future- like when I am 60 she will be 40- when I am 80 and pushing a walker- she will be in her 60's- in some ways we will never quite be in the same place at the same time and maybe that is what assures her and makes her quiet my fear.

    Time and age have standards that we measure them by- and then they don't. So would I look for someone 20 years younger than me next time or if I had to do it all over again. I do not know- I was not looking the first time and yet I found her.

    I really think it is person- not the age
     
  14. PianoKeys

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    When I was 25 I met a 34 year old, now I am 31 and I still would date 9 years older. Perhaps 10, maybe 12 years older.... It just depends on the connection.

    I dont think I would date younger, I think five years younger would be my max. But I prefer not. I dont know it does not feel right for me.

    Its all about the connection anyway so like latenlifelez says , it is the person not the age. Anything could happen
     
  15. NYCer

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    I'm 46 years old, divorced with 2 kids, dating a 25 year old, though I think the relationship is primarily physical, at least started out that way. Frankly, I was surprised she wanted to be intimate with me after knowing how old I was, though I do look young for my age (or so I'm told). I would probably prefer to date someone in my 30s, but I enjoy being with her for now. However, I don't think this well be long-term as she is a foreign graduate student and will likely return to her home country in about a year.
     
  16. looking for me

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    absolutely would. maybe not a teenie boper or early 20s but 30s? yes 40s of course. the question is would they want an old lady like me?
     
  17. PianoKeys

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    Hello looking for me haha, looking for me is looking for me... okay..had my moment of joy...

    now back to bizz

    Yes they would : D Well I would if I fall in love.

    Connection beats numbers big time . For example I say probably so many years and or probably not this young or this old etc...etc.., but in the end its the connection.

    I did learn to not say never , because then it happens.

    *Coughs... I NEVER HAD A MILLION EUROS FALL FROM THE SKY....*

    Now lets wait and see if that works to ! ; )

    ---------- Post added 27th Feb 2017 at 11:25 AM ----------

    *Then I realize maybe it happened but not here where I am..**** I did it wrong!!!*
     
  18. BrookeVL

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    Not to be too blunt, but we get along and they're okay with me having a penis, we're good.....
     
  19. Creativemind

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    I'm not quite 30 yet, but yeah, I would. I'm 26 now and I prefer younger women (Ages 20-24 ish). Might not change later on.
     
  20. YeahpIdk

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    I think there are a lot of adults who don't have "adult skills" either. Look for them! :grin:

    As you can see in the thread, everyone differs. It's always where you're at in life, and what your personality is. You could meet a 21 year old who's got all their crap together, is a millionaire and wise beyond their years. Or a 50 year old that's immature and still lives off of an allowance from their parents. Everyone's different, and I'd take people with who they show you they are, as opposed to grouping them in an age range.

    Of course, except for extreme cases, when they're a lot younger than you. Like, I don't recommend people who are twenty years apart while one is forty and the other is 20. I've seen that on here sometimes, and it definitely seems like it would be an unhealthy balance. I think 18-20, though "adult," is still kind of teenagery. There's a significant difference in mentality, usually. But who knows. Some people on here have those relationships, maybe come on talking about it because they're worried it's an issue, and they're extremely happy with that person -- and the responses are sort of mixed: some say it's bad, some think it's not an issue.

    Base people on who they are! (!) That is definitely what dating is for.