I have been attracted to men ever since I can remember. But i did fall in love and marry a lovely woman. I have, throughout marriage had many visits to saunas and had many anonymous meets with guys. It has come to the point, at the age of 49, that I cannot continue with the double life. Some men I know are very happy to keep two separate lifestyles going...but it just does my head in. So I told my wife. Really bad timing as we are on holiday with in-laws, close friends and our boys. On the other hand...it has meant my wife has the support of loving family and friends. I am clearing my head for a few days...but will return to the family holiday...my my wife loves me a lot and wants me to be there with the family. I am relieved that it is out in the open...and I have no more secrets...that is so freeing. I know there are going to be some very hard conversationsand decisions ahead...I would value any support any one has. I feel like I have probably ruined many peoples lives.