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It's Not Cheating If It's With Another Gender!

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Kaiser, Nov 4, 2015.

  1. Kaiser

    Kaiser Guest

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    This is something I've heard before and, interestingly, even seen mentioned on this very forum.

    What do you think? Is it cheating if you're with another gender, than the individual you are currently with? Why do people accept this?

    As usual, the most witty or interesting answer wins.
     
  2. Steve FS

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    I like to think of this like cheating on an exam.

    Is it still cheating if you copy the answers off of a person who is the opposite gender of you? I think so.

    Of course, we really need to define what cheating is, as there's a whole spectrum of degrees of cheating. Personally, if my gay boyfriend gets dared to kiss a girl and he does, I don't find that cheating. I'd honestly find it quite funny because I know he wouldn't enjoy it.

    If he willing kisses a girl because he is attracted to her and wanted to (in which case I would seriously question his gay status), then I'd consider that cheating.

    [edit] forgot to mention. Anything with genitalia = cheating. IDC if ur penor didn't like the vajay, it still touched it yo
     
    #2 Steve FS, Nov 4, 2015
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2015
  3. Yosia

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    But you have got to understand! A penis was not put in a vagina so it can't possibly be cheating! How could you accuse me so?!
     
  4. DinelodiiGitli

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    No, of course not.
    It's only cheating if a man cheats on his wife with another woman or if a woman cheats on her husband with another man. Everything else is just exploring your options. Also it's only cheating if it's real sex, between one man and one woman because the Bible clearly states that it's for procreation only. That's why homosexuality doesn't occur in nature.


    And in case you didn't catch on I'm being sarcastic.
    Of course it's still cheating, what kind of idiocy is infesting the general public to make anyone think otherwise? Cheating is cheating regardless of sex or gender.
     
  5. Phalange

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    Well, I hope that's what her boyfriend thinks.




    Does this way of thinking only apply to certain kinds of cheating?
     
  6. Kaiser

    Kaiser Guest

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    I like that.

    To give you an example of what I was talking about...

    In a group of individuals I sometimes interact with, we were discussing various things. The topic of relationships came up, and it lead to the subject of cheating. All of the guys agreed, if their girlfriend/wife was with another man, it was cheating. However, of this group of 6, only 1 of them said it was still cheating if their girlfriend/wife was with another woman.

    Their reasoning?

    One of them said, it wasn't fair to restrict a woman from another woman because, simply put, he isn't a woman and can't provide an experience like a woman. A little ignorance, but I was mostly impressed by this answer, because it was pretty deep.

    Another said, and this is about what I was expecting, that a woman messing around with another woman is how they have fun. They'll eventually come around to being with a man, when they've decided to grow up/mature/move on. A lot of ignorance, but something I tend to notice or overhear in men, they don't view other women as competition, either because they believe everyone has to be male-female relationships or, worse, they see women-women relationships as inferior to/preparation for men.

    The others, pretty much, agreed with the other two; some leaning one way more so.

    The one who still considered it cheating said, and I quote:

    "If a woman shot your dog, would you want to press less charges on her?"

    This failed to change their minds, which is something else revealing.
     
  7. Nekoko

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    I'm not a great expert on cheating since I don't have strong feelings about my love being with other girls, aside from wanting intimate steamy details that is~ :grin: but at the same time, I WOULD be a bit put off if she was with a guy... It's not like I actively think one is cheating over the other, I just have a certain dislike of the idea.... which is probably not very fair honestly, I'm not proud of that, but it would bother me... :frowning2: idk...

    I kinda figure what is cheating and not cheating should be an agreed on thing between couples....
     
  8. Distant Echo

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    My co-habiting male (not my partner anymore) is fine with me finding a girlfriend because sex between women isnt real sex and he will quite happily watch and then jump me because I will obviously then want the real thing...

    One of many reasons why we are co-habiting only now. He has no bloody idea. No penis=not sex

    Blah!

    So, yes, same sex is cheating, which is why I've ended it with him. I've given him the go ahead to chase someone he is interested in, and I have someone I am very interested in.
     
    #8 Distant Echo, Nov 4, 2015
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2015
  9. biAnnika

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    Answer: cheating is a violation of an understanding.

    So if your understanding (explicit or implicit, say, by virtue of being married) is that you will not have sex with others, then having sex with others is cheating. If your understanding is that sex with others is fine, then it is. If your understanding is that you may have sex with one other person, and you have sex with two, that's cheating.

    The reason people get away with this crap about "if it's another woman [or man], then it isn't having sex with others" is because society invalidates gay sex and relationships. And it pisses me the hell off.

    So I've been in a monogamous relationship with my partner for the past 29 years. By these yoho's logic, I could have been having sex with as many women as I wanted all that time, and it wouldn't have been cheating! In fact, it's unclear whether or not (by their logic) it would be cheating if I had sex with a guy. They don't consider ff sex to be sex. They don't consider a ff relationship to be a relationship. So if I'm not in an actual relationship with my partner (having actual sex), then how could it be cheating for me to have sex with a guy?

    The whole thing is fucked. Sorry to rant.
     
  10. rainbowtheorist

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    Hi,

    For me cheating is not about physical act, it's more about lying and betrayal. If you have an interaction that you didn't discuss with you're partner, it doesn't matter with which gender it is, it's cheating.

    As a bisexual I understand the desir and curiosity to be with another gender, the best solution for me was to talk about it with my partner and we found a solution which suited us both.
     
  11. Kaiser

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    That logic applies, if said woman is in relationship with them. Which says enough about them. But, you know, plenty of people accept other things that have tons of logical holes...

    Also, you used yoho's... I had no idea we were talking like a "hip" 1950s P.S.A. video.
     
  12. Foz

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  13. PerfectlyNormal

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    Depends what the partner says.
     
  14. Justinian20

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    Hi children, if I were to have sex with woman, I would be cheating on my partner if he were male, yes the experience is different but your man trusts you and if you go break that trust well it's the doghouse for you. But first of all why in the blimmin hell do you all think if you have sex with the gender opposite of your husband and wife it's not cheating.

    Sit down Tony, no you can't do that either unless of course your man agrees to it. You see my boyfriend trusts me not to go playing with other guys because we be exclusive to each other. Unless of course he be like all busy, rings me up on his phone and says, Hi cutie, I know we planned to have sexual times tonight but I be super busy and decided you could have sex with someone else. But I doubt that would happen, if it did the world would be turned upside down.

    Second of all, why would I have sex with a woman, when I can have sex with a man.

    Goodbye children, I'll be leaving for anuvva day.
     
  15. kageshiro

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    Maybe monogamy should be updated to include one boyfriend and one girlfriend per person, so Bisexuals wouldn't have to chose one over the other, also it would clear up this issue. Or, maybe society should evolve to be more accepting of open relationships instead of hating anything that isn't strictly monogamous. If people would simply get over this idea that sleeping with multiple partners is an inherently bad thing and stop making unrealistic commitments they can't fulfill than the entire problem of relationships ending due to someone cheating could potentially be solved.
     
  16. armydude

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    Most of the hardcore anti-gay pastors out there would probably agree with that
     
  17. Plattyrex

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    If it's done without consent of your partner it is always cheating. If you have consent it's fine I guess. I don't really see why somebody would care one way and not the other though, doesn't seem very fair.
     
  18. Lone Dragon

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    If Bugs Bunny was sneaking behind Lola's back with Roger Rabbit, umm I still think that's cheating. It's like a break of trust and understanding between two bunnies, unless the two were fine with it.

    In all seriousness, I think going behind someone's back with just another human being is cheating.
    I've known people who think a relationship isn't real unless it's with another gender, simply because a gay relationship or sex isn't about procreation. I'm mean like whatever...
     
  19. Raining

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    I believe its cheating as soon as you have something to hide... gender has nothing to do with it!
     
  20. Chi and Bashful

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    Lol this post...and comments...but yes it is unless your fortunate enough to be in an open relationship it's cheating
     
    #20 Chi and Bashful, Nov 4, 2015
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2015