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it can get better

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Ilovepumas, Mar 11, 2020.

  1. Ilovepumas

    Regular Member

    Joined:
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    hi

    i was looking through my old emails and i found an email confirmation for this website from 3 years ago. curiously, i clicked on the email and found my account. it seems that i made an account on this website when i was quite young, freshly turning 13 yrs old at the time. by reading the post i created, suddenly i remembered the pain i wrote in the post describing how i was anxious after coming out to ACCEPTING parents. at that time in my life, i hadn't yet realized that i was in an abusive situation. i remember the pain of not sharing the anxiety and suicidal thoughts i was experiencing, and feeling like i would never experience happiness again. i just wanted to say to all the young ppl on this website, it can get better. it will get better. plz don't bottle up everything you have in your minds, attempt to reach out for help. you dont deserve to feel worthless, you dont deserve to fee like you have eyes watching you at all time. you dont deserve to feel the pain youre feeling. you are strong for finding a community to help with your feelings. i sure wish i had posted more on here instead of self containing my emotions, its a very big regret of mine for not finding for outlets for emotional support/therapy sooner.

    now, im 16 yrs old and am meeting with a therapist and have been approached with an opportunity to start anti-depression/anxiety meds. i had been feeling unstable for a long period of time until a traumatic experience happened to a friend of mine. i broke down. i had a self realization that "what the fck am i gonna lose by saying something?" just from opening up a few times with my therapist and parents i feel like a heavy burden is slowly being lifted off my back. yes i still have bad days, but im starting to see growing optimism in my life. i'm starting to feel more "normal" if that really exists. dont be ashamed for what you are experiencing, do what you can to help yourself.

    if you are in an abusive situation at home you are so close to getting the fck out of there. that pain you feel is what they have projected onto you. you are incredibly strong and i believe you can get through this <3

    if you are in an abusive "romantic" relationship, i know what you feel when you stare at the ceiling at night. just know that you are loved by others who appropriate you. if you've been through the cycle once and want to take them back, do everything you can to resist. its fcking hard not to see their charm and warm smiles once they crawl back for an apology but i know you can look though that and see them for the actions they did to you. you deserve better, you have meaning and worth. run and dont look back. the guilt will try and pull you back in..... much love


    maybe ill come back in another 3 years and share what ive learned frm that point LOL

    ilovepumas (lmfao this username)
     
  2. elegia

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    thank you for sharing this :slight_smile: <3
     
  3. Rin311

    Regular Member

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    Gay
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    Out to everyone
    Thank you. You're right, it does get better. Take care.