1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

I'm really angry.

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by Natasha Elyssa, May 31, 2017.

  1. Natasha Elyssa

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jun 7, 2015
    Messages:
    418
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    New York
    So I'm starting to get really tense lately. Bloody everybody and their mother is testing me. People I have to deal with in school I just ignore what they say, but my classmates aggravate me with their blatant cringey stupidity and whining, like I always end up in the dumb classes, school year is almost ending and graduation is getting closer and it's really starting to stress me out, I need to get ready for college, ugh the list goes on. Nothing is different with my parents in general, they've always been arrogant totalitarians. But my mom is stepping up the pressure and really increasing her hysterics and victim mentality and she's constantly arguing with me and yelling about something. Tonight she really got me mad because she harassed me all day to wait for a repair man who showed up after my dad came home to take my place and, when I wanted to show her some concept art I made of my "new" used car, she flipped out and freaked on me. She said that I can't do that, that I would be taking a beautiful car and ruining it, and completely trashing my pictures. Then she starting ranting and raving about my college orientation in a few weeks. She acts like me going to college is a personal attack on her way of life. She wants to take a plane one day, then a bus, then a car. She can't make up her mind on how to get there. I'm one step away from just packing my bags and leaving without her and just driving myself. And on top of my mom's frequent bitching and moaning, my dad is getting on my case about money and getting a job. "Eh! Why don't you go buy your own medicine? Why don't you pay for it yourself?" "I don't have any money dad. I can't find a job." "Eh, too bad! You gotta get a job. Pay your weight!" And all that fun stuff. Stuff he started dogging my sister for when she was told she was "cancer free" and all that. Now he wants me to start supporting myself after fighting to keep me dependant. Like, WTF is going on here? And it's not like I'm not trying to get a job. I've applied for 8 jobs, got 4 no's, got 2 put into a "talent pool" for future reference, one never called me back, and the last one I'm just applying to now. It's ridiculous. I can't find a job and my parents are getting on my back, school is stressing me out, and I'm about a second away from snapping. I can't bloody handle this anymore. Even when I'm away at college I'm sure they'll find a way to make me miserable. And don't even get me started on holidays and breaks. I'm going to lose my mind. And the people around me aren't exactly helpful.

    Does anybody have any advice for me? Anything? Because I need to think of something to do about all of this or else I'm either going to snap or have a bloody stroke. I'm so heated right now, like no one understands how heated and twisted and wound-up I am. I'm like about to break. Nothing but bloody pressure. Pressure and stress. Stress and anxiety. Anxiety and depression. Depression and anger. Anger and more depression. Depression and anxiety. Anxiety and anger. The whole flipping cycle. It's ridiculous. I've had it. I swear to god. I'm about to just start violating people, starting with my parents. They treat me like a puppy on a leash. Like, I need to be forced to do things and be treated and made to believe that I'm inferior. Like, my parents are totalitarian, arrogant, infallible, emotionally unstable, stupid, ignorant pieces of actual human fecle matter. Like, bloody heck. Can't deal with this anymore, can't stand it.
     
  2. silverhalo

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 22, 2008
    Messages:
    10,698
    Likes Received:
    3,722
    Location:
    England,
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Hey I'm sorry you are having such a tough time. It sounds like you need to find a way to let your frustrations out. Maybe try putting some music on a dancing and singing to try and burn it off or go for a run. What about your art work does that help you relax?
     
  3. Zoe Izumi

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Sep 23, 2015
    Messages:
    395
    Likes Received:
    28
    Location:
    Michigan
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Some people
    I like to go in Fallout(3, nv, or 4) turn on god mode, give myself a mininuke launcher, and blow the wasteland to hell.

    That's how I blow off steam. It really helps me to do that, so I thought I'd share that method with you.