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I want to tell my mom I'm bi SOOO bad!

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Mind Freak, Jul 24, 2008.

  1. Mind Freak

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    But I don't know how to do it.
    I'm honestly at a loss for words.

    I don't think she'll react like angrily or anything.

    But I don't want her to be disappointed or anything!
    A Parental Control show on MTV and it was two guys and she didn't say anything positive or negative; except that the guy's hair was ugly.

    I was so uncomfortable.
    She was cooking dinner and I was thinking about how to throw it in the convo but I got nothing.

    I think I'm just going to say "I have something that I want to tell you" and just write it down and give it to her because I'm not going to be able to get it out of my mouth.

    Will you give me an ego boost???
     
  2. Asher4heart

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    Hey yeah I had the same problem. I just sat her down and was liek mom. I need to talk to you. And i just said it. But when i told my bestie I wrote it down. Mothers love you unconditionally. Weather you are gay, bi, or even transqueer!!! lol so just do what ever you can and i'm sure mom will still love you and support you no matter what
    :slight_smile:
     
  3. Antrioss

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    When I had to tell my best friends that I was gay, it felt so surreal. Like I was in a dream, not being able to control my voice or actions. I haven't had a negative reaction yet, but if you haven't told anyone that you're bisexual yet, then you have to start somewhere. Once you start, it starts getting a lot easier and less awkward. :slight_smile:
     
  4. Mirko

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    Hi there! Coming out to our parents is hard because we don't want them to be disappointed. Your mom will not be disappointed with you, rather she will be disappointed that her dreams did not materialize. I think you already might have a few indications as to how your mom might react. You know your mom, and it seems that she would be accepting.

    I think the best way to come out to her is to be honest and reassure her that you have not changed. There is no right or wrong way to say it but try to take into account her feelings and that it might be a surprise to her. Maybe think about a context, such as the MTV show that you watched in which you could place your coming out. If you are too nervous to talk to her in person, a letter is a good idea. Again, be honest and make sure to tell her that you love her and that is the reason that you are telling to her this.

    Please remember that timing is also very important. Whether you talk to her or you give her the letter, try to do it during a time when she is relaxed and not in a rush. This will minimize the possibilities for any misunderstandings and unexpected reactions. Sometimes, when we are in a rush or experience stress, we react differently than we otherwise would. Try to find a good time when she and you are relaxed and have some time to talk about it as well.

    If you want to you could also print out some PFLAG material for your mom in case she does have some questions or is concerned or worried. Becky would be able to give you some pointers on that as well.

    Hope this helps! Good Luck!
     
  5. Asher4heart

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    Yeah you know i noticed that to. Once i started telling people...it just got easier and easier and easier
     
  6. Mind Freak

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    .... Really?
    Ok I think I'm going to tell her when she gets out of the shower.

    Or before she goes to bed.

    That's normally when she's the most mellow.
     
  7. Antrioss

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    Go for it! Tell me--err US, how it turned out! Good luck!
     
  8. Mind Freak

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    Whew. Ok.
    I'll tell you.

    Assuming I don't have a heart attack. Lmao.

    I hate butterflies and stuff.
    *inhales deeply*
     
  9. Asher4heart

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    YOU CAN DO IT!!! at least you don't have to tell her ur transqueer...i'm not even looking forward to that convo...so not telling it to her ne time soon v.v
     
  10. Antrioss

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    You're going to need a lot more courage, Miles. (Isn't that your future self? Correct me if I'm wrong). I seriously hope that all goes well with your coming out. Its hard taking the big risk of being labeled "different" from all the others. We're here for you.
     
  11. Asher4heart

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    lol no miles is muh buddy he is going trans too. My future self is actually asher-heart. And i liek being different. It's the other people i'm worried about and i am a bit scared because it is such a big step...but i think i will be happier...nd i'll still be gay..thats twisted man lol
     
  12. Antrioss

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    I see, well sorry for the mistake >.<
    I'm glad to know that you can find happiness in all the danger there is where you live.
     
  13. Asher4heart

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    ugh...i just told my 'bestie' about being transqueer...nd she liek...she was liek nuthing you say or do surprises me ne more...bleck...now my good mood is gone...
     
  14. Antrioss

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    Well that's technically good. I think . . . .

    Hey Mind Freak, did you die from a heart attack telling your mom? Ooh, maybe you're talking it out. I should shut up now. >_>
     
  15. Derek the Wolf

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    The way I did it is I had her sit down. I didn't look her directly in the eyes, but off to the side. I took several breaths in silence before the words came out. Then I forced them. When you're that nervous, that's the only way to do it, force them. Just make sure that when you put yourself in that kind of situation, you're completely ready to tell her.
     
  16. Mind Freak

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    No I'm still alive!
    Mostly because I chickened out.

    I was trying to say it but my tongue just lolled around in my mouth, my mouth got dry, and i just couldn't get it out.

    I think I just need to practice and say it out loud by myself a few times so I'll know what it feels like to say "I'm bi"

    I have to get this done soon or else I'm going to look like raccoon because of insomnia. Haha.
     
  17. Antrioss

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    Aw, I wrote my first coming outs. It took forever just to type the words. I bet I would have chickened out if I had done them face to face.
     
  18. Asher4heart

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    Yeah i had to right it down when i told my first one. i couldnt say it v.v
     
  19. Mind Freak

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    I'm going to have to do that too.
    I'm noticing that there's no way I'm going to get that out of my mouth at this point.

    I need a Big Mac!
     
    #19 Mind Freak, Jul 24, 2008
    Last edited: Jul 24, 2008
  20. biisme

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    I hope you find a way to get it out, and I'm sending you good thoughts!!!!!!!!!!!

    (*hug*)