(Firstly i want to say that im still not sure if i am trans, but i think i dont want to be called as a girl.) This is the first time im writing things about this. So, im in highschool and i was wondering; what if i came out? So yes, i want people to call me a boy but im really curious if they sill accept me. Maybe they will make fun of me? And also, when i grow up, would it be okay to come out at work? Im especially feeling scared about that. Since my country is not loving lgbt people at all, do you think it would be ok to come out trans at work?
You really shouldn’t come out at school unless you school has a lgbtq support group or something like that. Lgbtq youth have some of the highest rates of violent bullying and depending on the religion of the area it could be dangerous for your family. So unless you have a lgbtq support group and if you don’t live in a religious area do it but if not no.
Ilovemycat13.....Hello and a great big LGBTQIA+ welcome to Empty Closets! I can remember the first post that I made on EC. I was desperate for help and I got the help that night that I so needed. I hope that we can help you in the same way that I received help. The most important thing to remember about Empty Closets is that we do care about you! We're very glad that you found us here on EC and hope that we can answer questions, give you support and provide a place to vent (as long as it's not violent!) when that becomes necessary! *****There are 18 different sub-forums here that you can check out and join in the conversations or start your own thread/conversation. In particular you may want to check out the forum that is titled "Gender Identity and Expression”, there are people there who have dealt with some of the same kind of issues that could be challenging you. *****When you have made at least 10 posts on various threads you will be able to post messages on a member's Profile Page. Just click on a member's Avatar Picture and then click on "Profile Page" in the dialogue box that pops up. You'll then be on their Profile Page and there will be a box that says: "Write Something" When you have been on EC for a few weeks and have made at least 50 posts on various forums, you can apply for Full Membership. A Full Member can send Private Messages (PM) to other Full Members and share personal contact info. Right now you can only send a PM to a Staff Member as that is always possible. Here is a quote from the Full Membership information forum: *****To be eligible you must be a member of Empty Closets for a minimum of two weeks, and have a minimum of 50 posts. These posts must be across numerous forums (Fun & Games does not contribute to post count), and consistently posted across a minimum of two weeks. You wouldn't be eligible, for example, if you registered, had no activity for two weeks, and then returned to post 50 times on your 14th day of membership. *****Well, as I said, we're very glad you found us! If you have any questions at all, you can post a question on my Profile Page or send me a Private Message. .....David
Ilovemycat13.....Coming out can be wonderful, but it can also be not so wonderful depending on how everyone reacts to the news. If you are living in a place where being gay is not safe, then you should be very careful about who you tell or if you tell anyone at all. Coming out at work can be even more problematic as people at work may not have the same kind of connection to you that relatives have. Relatives may keep your secret if it's not safe to be out, but people at work may not have any reason to do so. If you are going to come out...here is a suggestion that may make it easier. *****You might want to consider using a letter WHEN the time comes to tell your relatives/friends. A big plus to a letter is that you don't have to be present when the letter is read. That can be a very big help as it eliminates the potential face-to-face confrontation that can sometimes go bad. Coming out in writing means you will not be interrupted or face a barrage of questions that you need to answer immediately, in the heat of the moment. You get time and they get time too and that counts for a lot. It gives the people reading the letter some time to think before they talk to you. After all, you've had time to think about your sexuality, perhaps for years…giving them at least some time to think about it too only seems fair! There are some great sample coming out letters here on Empty Closets that could be a big help to you. Even if you don't eventually use the letter, taking time to think about it and to write one will help you to be sure to say what you need to say and leave out the rest! You can then use the letter as a "script" for when you do come out face-to-face. Check out the letters (see below)...they could be a real help! *****Also...when you do come out, whether it's tomorrow or a year from now, your relatives and/or friends will probably have questions. Take some time now to think about what those questions might be. Such as; "How do you know you're gay?" or "How long have you felt this way?" etc. The questions themselves will vary a great deal dependent upon your family and friends...so take that into consideration. If you work up a list of five or six probable questions with the answers already planned, you will likely be perceived as a more mature, serious person. *****COMING OUT LETTERS: http://emptyclosets.com/home/pages/resources/coming-out-letters.php *****Remember...you are a part of our LGBTQ Family and we do care! Keep us updated on how things are going for you! (By the way...I love my kitty Kat too! You can see a photo of her in my photo album) .....David
