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I think I'm turning a corner?

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by RJay, Aug 29, 2017.

  1. RJay

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    Hi all...

    Don't have too much time to write right now, but I wanted to share that I think I've turned a corner regarding the situation with V. Not to disappoint the fans of my romcom, but with some distance and introspection (and relative silence on V's part) my crush has died down, and I'm thinking more sensibly that even if "something" could happen with her, it's not a good idea. Of course, who knows what will happen when she gets back to town. Seeing her will surely get the crush going again, but I really think I have to treat our relationship as a friendship. I think it has been very one-sided so far. She's a great person but with lots of turmoil and needs. Considering everything I'm going through, trying to make it into something more than friendship is probably a disaster waiting to happen. And I don't want to lose her and her kids completely. We will see how things go when she is back. My current thought is that I might be able to just light-heartedly mention that I developed quite a crush on her over the summer but I know she is straight so she needn't worry about it. Something along those lines.

    In the meantime, there is another woman (4 doors away on my block) who is paying lots of attention to me, and we will be going out one night soon. I'm not 100% sure she is gay, but all signs point to that being a strong possibility. I get a distinctly "not straight" vibe from her, and she is very eager to get to know me alone and with alcohol involved. So, hmmm. I find her extremely attractive, so I'm going to explore where that might be headed. We shall see.
     
  2. driedroses

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    I love this update! :slight_smile: I love that you're still following your heart, but also letting your head lead. And that you're recognizing V is not an all or nothing proposition - you have options with her and options with other people. I'm so glad that you are finding yourself in this way. And remember to keep updating! Your story is definitely a thrill ride, and very encouraging.
     
  3. silverhalo

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    As one of the main followers of your Romcom, I don't see this as a disappointing update at all, an all comsuming crush as you had on V is great and exciting and stirs all manner of feelings but in that sense is never sustainable, you were seeing her as some kind of goddess and holding someone on that can't of pedestal can only end one way. Everyone has faults. I think it's great that you are pursuing this other woman and the bottom line is I just want a happy ending where you get the girl, I don't care which girl as long as you like her haha.

    Soooo when is this date?
     
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  4. RJay

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    Girl #2 (call her L) is coming over today with her son. Our boys will play, and we'll order pizza. We will go out the next time we are both childless one night. Might be within the week.

    We have been chatting when we run into each other on the sidewalk over the past month or so. She has even texted me to meet her on the sidewalk to chat over a cigarette when our kids are sleeping. She is feminine but I just get a bit of a "gay vibe" from her. She keeps suggesting bringing a bottle of wine over to my apartment one night. She is an executive at a major media company. (A movie cable channel we all know.) And she plays street hockey in her spare time! Street hockey! I saw her walking with her hockey stick one day, haha.

    My friends tell me I am now looking 100% gay, whatever that means, so I am hoping that her eagerness to get to know me means she might be too. Of course, there is every chance she is just another unusually friendly straight woman looking for single mom solidarity. I will try to not get hung up on her if that's the case. But, I don't know... Hope the conversation goes that way soon so I can know her deal.
     
  5. idsm

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    I keep thinking that L's advances might stir V's jealousy a little bit.
    It will be interesting to see her reaction.

    (God, I'm so bad! :laughing:)
     
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  6. driedroses

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    Love it! :grin:
     
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  7. beenthrdonetht

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    One positive sign with L is that she took the first step. If I recall correctly from your Tolstoyan other thread. (Adjective meant affectionately!) That has always been a good harbinger in my experiences.

    And street hockey! That's verging on badass.
     
  8. RJay

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    Oh V took all the first steps too. I think that's why I fell so hard. Trying not to get ahead of myself with L. She could be straight and just super friendly like V. We will see.
     
  9. Really

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    If I had to guess, I'd say straight women don't play street hockey past the age of 14. :wink:
     
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  10. zumbaqueen

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    And yet another chapter for your book, or sequel to the movie. Lol.
     
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  11. junebug99

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    I played street hockey until I was 19. Loved it.
     
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  12. Really

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    You're just proving my point. Haha.
     
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  13. RJay

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    LMAO, you guys. Yeah, I feel like a jerk for equating street hockey with "not straight", but honestly... Hmmm. She's in a "league" and everything and is apparently very good at it. Very down to earth, pizza and beer kind of person. Like I said, we shall see.
     
  14. OED27x

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    I don't know one straight woman that plays street hockey. I don't know any women that play street hockey, but damn, that's sexy anyway.

    We are all so so gay. Lol.
     
  15. RJay

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    LOL! She is sooooo cute. Like honestly.
     
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  16. OED27x

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    I get it. I bet she looked cute as hell with that hockey stick. Let us know how your pizza party goes.
     
  17. RJay

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    The cutest. She is due in 5 minutes. I will report back. :wink:
     
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  18. idsm

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    Wouldn't it be awesome if Rjay set up a live webcam so that we could spy on their date?
    You know, Rjay, it's for science. Just so we can give you our opinion whether she's into you or not.

    Imagine Rjay becoming the apple of discord and L and V bitch fighting over her.
    Now, we DEFINITELY need live coverage of that.
     
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  19. beenthrdonetht

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    I've got it sooooo bad! Make it stop!
     
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  20. RJay

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    You guys! HAHAHA!

    OK, so we had a lovely time. The boys are a handful, so we didn't get toooo much talking in. But she asked me to text her later when I walk the dog so she can join me for a cigarette.

    She seemed soooooo straight tonight. Little black dress coming straight from work. Nothing came up to indicate that she isn't straight. I might not know unless I come right out and ask when we get together alone. Yikes. No idea how to do that suavely. AT ALL.