So, I don't think that I will be able to sleep if I don't put this in words somewhere. That's why I'm writing it here. Even though I am almost in my second year of University, I still get homesick. I visit home regularly, but I still have nights where I start crying for no good reason and fondly remember positive memories. A part of me wants to be hugged. Despite the fact that I usually dislike hugs. Gentle ones are appreciated though. Especially if I am emotionally close to the person hugging me. I am glad that I won't have to see the majority of my flatmates ever again. Living in halls so far... it doesn't feel like I actually live here. There's parties in the kitchen, but I'm not supposed to walk in which is stupid because I live here too! It's supposed to be a communal space, but people claim it like that. A lot of the time I feel lonely. My closest friend is no longer so close, now that he's popular I barely get to see him anymore. Whenever I do, I am just reminded of how different he is now. Sometimes I make new friends, but then they drop out or would only ever hang if I was the last person available. I just... I'm sad. Plain and simple. I hear people having fun in a building next to us sometimes, and wish I had that. Same with watching YouTubers hanging out. But when I am home, I get to ignore these things for a while. Talk with my family. I don't feel like anyone's last choice there. Sorry, I know I'm being a downer right now. It's just my late night brain talking. Now, I best get some sleep or I'll regret it in the morning. Maybe some happy music first.
Hi @Canterpiece, I’m sorry to hear that you’re struggling. Being a non-drinker, I found finding a group of friend at university pretty tough too. I didn’t really click with people I was in halls with. The one person I did get on with, left university altogether. I ended commuting from home, but did eventually make a group of friends that I still keep in contact with. As they’re excluding you from communal areas, I’d say they’re probably not very nice people. Could you join a society? Try to find some people that enjoy similar things to you. Or is there anybody on your course that could be a potential friend? Will you be in halls next year?
I'm already in a society. The people there are nice, and I am slowly getting to know them. However, a few will be graduating soon. I suppose I could always join another. At the moment I'm part of the improv society, and the LGBT club. The latter doesn't meet very often, and the planning is atrocious. I've only met the group once throughout the entire first year. Although, I am considering getting a part-time job, and I don't know how busy my second year is going to be. Now, as for people on my course, it can be hard to get a conversation going. Most people just want to know what they have to do, and then leave. There are a few people that I'm gradually getting to know, but it's a rather slow process. Sometimes you connect with someone quickly. Other times it's a tedious process. You can't force it though, obviously. Nor should you want to. I will be in halls again next year.
