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I like guys in theory but not in practice...

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by tay98, Aug 16, 2017.

  1. tay98

    Regular Member

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    okay so I identify as bi, but now i'm not sure. I always thought I liked boys growing up but I never had a crush on anyone until I was about 15 and she's a girl. And all my crushes after that have been girls. When I think about who i like i can picture myself with anyone but in reality i seem to only be drawn to women. I've hooked up with girls and flirted with girls, but whenever a guy tries to flirt with me or wants to kiss me i'm just not interested. I've never even kissed a guy, and that's because i've never actually met a guy who I wanted to kiss.
    This is so confusing because I can see a guy and find him attractive but i don't think I could ever actually date or kiss a guy unless I actually really got to know him. But with girls that doesn't seem to matter at all. Does this make sense to anyone? I feel way more attracted to girls but there's still that possible attraction to men, which is why I say i'm bi, not gay.
    Can anyone relate??
     
  2. Creativemind

    Regular Member

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    I do relate, sort of. I'm not bi, but I'm a lesbian who feels that way about girls (Like you do about guys). I don't feel like I'm attracted to girls until I get to know them, and I don't feel attracted to guys under any circumstance, ever. So to the outside world, I look like an asexual that can make exceptions for girls. To me, I just prefer the lesbian label because I feel like "asexual" would imply no attraction, ever. I don't lack attraction, It's just so rare that I can't relate to most lesbians. I've felt attracted to some girls, but it usually takes a long time to get there. I also have a very conservative sexuality, which doesn't work with most LGBT people, or even most people of this generation. I also relate to the thoughts thing. In theory, I imagine myself only with girls and enjoying sex with girls. But in reality, I am not really attracted to anyone of any gender. My last crush was three years ago. -shrug-

    You're not alone.
     
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  3. mlm1234

    mlm1234 Guest

    im bi/pan. i feel the same as you when i see a guy or girl in a room, dont feel any attraction towards them. my straight friends say like isnt she not or something. over i lean more towards gay. my type is more femininity anything do with that personality, looks. i can see a fem guy or girl and go see there cute or adorable, but not attraction. it not until i talk to them and know them intimately, this overall sexually attraction become present and i cant stop myself towards them. its weird all my friends gay/striaght seee people sexual attraction and can see it al the time in people. they have casual sex with people, i hate to do this, because i dont get it. without that contaction i dont have any sexual attraction and it would be meaningless and feel disgusting for me, and doing anything with them feels weird and gross. tried kissing a boy once hated it grossed, when i got to know them later could keep my hands off them.
     
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  4. AbsoluteNerd

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    That's perfectly normal, and honestly, I'm in a pretty similar place. I had one crush on a guy and we had been friends for a year-ish before that. But the possibility is still there, so I say I'm bi
     
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