Alright so my sister and my very close school friend who is a girl since i have come out as Bisexual have been calling me gay I'm not offended by it, I just was wondering if I should be letting it bother me as much as I have? My school friend has gay friends and she is like yelling in my ear (turn gay)x3 and she is like (date him)x3 but I just don't want to I'm new to being bisexual I don't even know if that's how I really feel it's an experiment and I like the idea of being able to enjoy the company of males and females so I'm testing the waters and became bisexual no I haven't had a boyfriend but I really want one but on my own terms I want someone I can cuddle with someone I can get close too you know?
If you're not totally comfortable dating someone then don't let anyone push you into it! You're your own person and you can experiment with your sexuality on your own time. I wish you the best of luck with your journey
If it bothers you when your sister and friend call you "gay" then tell them. It sounds like you haven't had much experience, and when people we're close to make presumptuous comments about our sexuality, even if it's intended in humor, it can be very off-putting. My sister used to make gay jokes even after I came out, and it put me off trying to get a boyfriend, because I felt like if I started dating a guy, then my relationship with him would be the butt of all her jokes. And its not a nice thought, that your relationship with someone could be treated as a joke by the other people in your life. I do regret that I did not stand up for myself more when I was newly out of the closet. One time I told the family I was going out (it was to celebrate the birthday of one of my straight friends) and my sister started singing "to the gay bar gay bar" and I said sharply "It's a straight friend's birthday, grow up" and the atmosphere in the room just went cold. So you don't need to get over-defensive, just tell them "I would appreciate it if you don't call me gay or try to dictate my dating life for me. I'm still newly exploring my sexuality, and I want to do it on my own terms, so unless I specifically ask you for support or your opinion, please keep your opinions about my sexuality to yourselves" or something along those lines. If the way these people are treating you is bothering you, then better to nip it in the bud. Don't let it build up over time and speak out about it after the tension gets the better of you. You're allowed to demand respect from your loved ones.
My young friend, I agree with Devil Dave. The mere fact that you wrote about this indicates that being referred to as "gay" does bother you, at least at this time. You are still exploring the whole matter about who you really are. That process may take time. Please don't allow yourself to be identified by others if that is not what you want. Indicate to your friend that you are bi, but if things, they will hear about it from you. *smile*
I agree with Devil Dave, it's important to set some boundaries when you're discovering your sexuality. It can be rough, and I heard this countless of times and also wished I said something about it. It can be a good lesson for people who are like your family, on how not to treat other people who are coming to terms with their own orientation. It does build up over time if you don't, that's a fact.
I'm really glad this got so many replys I really appreciate it, I'm still new to all this and I'm just not sure if it's what I really want and I never will that's the fun part though
Here is a little background my parents are big LGBTQ+ Fanatics since they got married which was 3 years ago I have two moms, my step brother is trans he is 7 FtoM and my sister is actually my step sister but same difference honestly she's probably just giving me a hard time, I'm no stranger to these kinda things but it does concern me hearing my sister purposefully say I'm gay when I confide in her my greatest secrets no she's not mature she's younger then me but i don't know we got really close since our moms got together I know my parents won't be mad if I got a boyfriend they probably would be happy and sit me and him down and pull out a bunch of condoms and tell us where they are cause they know we are teenagers and they always say if your gonna be irresponsible make sure they know how to do it safely it's embarrassing but it's why i love them goodnight
It's great that you're surrounded by other LGBT people and relatives who are supportive of LGBT people. But then again, some people can be a bit too enthusiastic when it comes to being supportive, to the point that it becomes intrusive, and you feel like you can't have a private sex life. So, it's not really that you're feeling offended by what they are saying, it's more like you want a bit more space to figure things out for yourself, without your family constantly getting involved. Keeping our sex life seperate from our family life is not about feeling ashamed or anything like that, it's about discovering another part of your life that you haven't fully explored yet, and it should be new and exciting to you, but having your family sticking their oar in your business kind of ruins that excitement. Kind of like how someone can ruin your excitement for watching a movie you haven't seen yet by blurting out spoilers, except its your real life. So again, be aware that you are entitled to your own private life, and your loved ones need to respect that.
