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I don't feel any different wearing my packer :(

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by I am Kakashi, Feb 20, 2015.

  1. I am Kakashi

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    Sorry for the absence, my people. Took a break from helping people because I was getting emotionally bogged down, so had to work on my ow stuff, gender and otherwise. but I'm heeeeere with a question, I guess it's a question.

    So I am a DFAB genderfluid person who started socially transitioning about a year ago to more neutral first name, pronouns, hair, and clothing.

    Anyway, decided that I wanted to actually present as full-on male, at least sometimes, so I bought a binder and a packer. Binder isn't here yet, but I got my packer (med size Mister Softie) and a nice jock strap for it. Strap is super comfy, packer is super comfy, it looks like me and is size appropriate. But had it on for over an hour now, and I don't really feel any different.

    I read a number of blogs and forum postings while doing my research and was expecting a feeling of comfort, familiarity, excitement, I dunno, something.

    It could be that I'm feeling pretty agender/ neutral today, or that without the binder I don't really feel like it 'matters'. Also am wearing girls skinny jeans so you almost can't really see it unless I sit down and you are STARING at my crotch. Anyway, was wondering if any genderfluid or trans guys ever got a packer that they didn't really connect with, and how to feel better about it.

    [So this is cross-posted to a different site, both are me, just trying to reach different types/ groups of DFAB people ^_^ )
     
  2. jay777

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    Have you tried some different clothing ?
     
  3. I am Kakashi

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    I haven't yet, and I don't have my damn binder yet, so obviously even with the packer I couldn't pass as male. But I at least thought I would feel SOMETHING.
     
  4. confuzzled82

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    I'm probably a bit more genderfluid than my profile indicates, but there are times when I'm stuffing my bra that it feels more like me, and other times that I don't really notice a difference. Actually, I'm fairly comfortable in the guys clothes I'm wearing right now (polo shirt and cargo pants.
     
  5. jay777

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    You could give it some time... and you could try some clothes where it can wiggle around a bit...

    (*hug*)
     
  6. ANewDawn

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    For some guys packing just doesn't do it for them. It's not necessary.
     
  7. anonym

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    Have you considered whether you need to pack? I get bottom dysphoria but it's not really an issue for me at this stage that I feel I need to pack and I'm open minded as to whether I ever will. The only time bottom dysphoria gets to me is when I'm showering or if I try to sleep in just underwear. I think a packer would help with that but at the same time I feel like it wouldn't feel authentic. I'd rather just accept what I have for now and avoid triggers. I think I will probably consider reassignment surgery in the future though so just because I'm uncomfortable with packing it doesn't mean that I wouldn't want the real thing (well, as close as I can get)
     
  8. monome

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    IMHO you should expect an epiphany while wearing it. It's just a prosthetic. In our times everything is advertised as something bringing you excitement and happiness. Maybe you expected too much?