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I did it, and it feels incredible

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by JAlfred, Dec 7, 2016.

  1. JAlfred

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    I did it. I came out to my parents

    I currently live with my them (moved back in after a job on the other end of the state didn’t work out). Unfortunately, I work closing shift at a grocery store and my days off jump around more than a caffeinated grasshopper, so there wasn’t a time I could shoot for to tell them in person. So, I typed up a coming out letter and left it on the kitchen table for them before I left for work.

    The funny thing was - the great thing was - as nervous as I was that whole day, I never regretted leaving that letter. For the first time in a long time I felt that I was doing something that needed doing, that I was finally moving forward in my life. I called my best friend, the only person I was out to at the time, before my shift started and told him I was going to come out to my parents and thanked him for his support through the years.

    My mom texted me three hours before my shift ended, saying that they both loved me and wanted to be happy. When I got home at 11 pm, I found she was waiting up for me. We sat in silence for a bit before she broke the silence. She reiterated that my sexual orientation doesn’t matter to her and the important thing is that I have a loving relationship, whether it be with a girlfriend or boyfriend.

    As the conversation moved on, I elaborated a little more on what I said in the letter; that I knew since middle school and had trouble accepting it, especially in high school, when I was afraid my sexuality would overshadow all of my other qualities. Since I’d mentioned in the letter that my romantic feelings were deeper for men, she asked if I thought I was bisexual or gay, to which I said I was bisexual (although, my attraction to women seems to be cooling off since coming out and my attraction to men strengthening, so I’m still trying to figure out what that means).

    We also talked briefly about extended family who might not be accepting, but found they were relatives we’d cut out of our lives anyway, so that wasn’t a big concern.

    My dad had intended to stay up as well, but due to his own work schedule, he fell asleep. However, the next day I got a text from him with much the same message of love and acceptance which my mom had sent in her own text. When he got home that day, I thanked him and he asked if I wanted to talk, to which I said no, but I’ll probably talk to him more later.

    It’s been strange since coming out, but a good kind of strange. On the whole, I’ve been in a better mood and felt more relaxed. I’m not out at work yet, but the coworker I usually close with commented that I seemed less uptight. Whenever I do start to experience a severe dip in mood, I find I’m able to come out of it much easier than before.

    The best thing, though, is the daydreaming and the possibility it implies. Since coming out, I find myself daydreaming about having a boyfriend, holding hands with him, cuddling with him, showing him off to friends and family, doing all those cheesy-but-sweet things people do when they’re in love. I dream these wonderful dreams without the shame which filled so much of my existence in my angry and sad younger years.

    I haven’t felt this happy in a long time. I can finally live as who I really am, and can do so with a supportive and loving family.

    I know I've kind of rambled here, but thank you all for listening. And, more importantly, thank you all for being on this site with kind words and endless wisdom. I haven't posted much here, but the responses to what I have posted have helped me a lot.
     
  2. Quantumreality

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    Congratulations, JAlfred!:thumbsup: That was a brave and nervewracking thing you did!

    I'm so happy that your parents were so accepting!:slight_smile:

    When your Dad asked if you wanted to talk, could he have been saying that he wanted to talk to you about this?

    Regardless, that was a great outcome!
     
    #2 Quantumreality, Dec 7, 2016
    Last edited: Dec 7, 2016
  3. wvbear

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    Great Story! Congratulations!
     
  4. Totesgaybrah

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    Congrats! I know exactly how you feel with the ^^^^^
    I love when A coming out story has a happy ending.:icon_bigg
     
  5. JAlfred

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    Thank you all for your comments! It's been a little strange living openly, but a good kind of strange, the kind of weird you feel when starting out on a new exciting adventure.

    Also, Quantum, you're probably right, now that I think about it; and besides, he's my dad and I've grown too far apart from him in the past few years.

    Again, thank you all so much for reading! :icon_bigg