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I came out and hell broke lose. I may not be back much...

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Kodo, Jan 4, 2016.

  1. Kodo

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    Hey guys. After I came out to my father (because my mother went behind my back and delivered the letter to him without me knowing) all hell broke loose for me. Needless to say, I've broken my parents' hearts and my coming out has incited depression, anger, paranoia, pain, and confusion amongst the family. My internet access is currently severed, and the only reason I can write this now is due to finding a temporary loophole.

    I'm in a very tough position and in a lot of pain right now that I don't have time to go into. I am not sure how often I'm going to have internet access for the next few months (until August, really) but I'll try to come and post when I can.

    Keep me in your thoughts and prayers.
     
  2. lovetoomuch

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    This seriously frustrates me to even read. I guess our parents were raised in a different time and think differently, but they should be happy you are now going to be able to live the life you want.
    I know it may be hard to think right now, but just know your happiness is just as important as anyone else's happiness, including your parents. I have faith this is going turn out in your favor.

    I'll be thinking of you. Good luck!
     
  3. Ram90

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    Sometimes parents just don't realize how their thoughts and emotions affect their children. It's unfortunate and that is the problem really. We think of them a lot when we decide to confide in them even if it isn't something as big as our sexuality. The not fair of them.

    I feel for you genuinely and hope things do get better for you. (*hug*)
     
  4. Chiroptera

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    Everyone here is rooting for you Kodo.

    Remember that it isn't your fault that all of this happened. Prejudice exists, and that is the real problem. You didn't do anything wrong, you didn't break their hearts. Prejudice is to blame.

    For now, don't mention the subject and try to distract yourself, especially since things aren't doing well. You did what you could and what was right.
     
  5. Michael

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    ... You keep your head above the waters at any price, ok?

    Talk to the mods, they are there for a reason, and will give you resources.

    I'm sorry things went wrong, but this battle doesn't mark the end of the war, keep that in mind.

    Don't give up, you know you can do this.
     
  6. bingostring

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    Keep strong... things will feel better after some days have passed
    Do you have a friend in real life you can lean on right now/??
     
  7. FootballFan101

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    Kodo, if you can read this, stay strong man, don't let it get to your head, what age are you?
     
  8. Open Arms

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    I'm SO sorry to hear this Kodo! :frowning2:

    I hope you can get internet access through a friend or finding another loophole.

    Are they rejecting your orientation for religious reasons? If so, they need to get educated on the subject. Your orientation is NOT a choice.
     
  9. Spartan 117

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    I'm very sorry to hear this, Kodo! Just remember: nothing lasts forever, and that goes double for the bad times. Even though it feels like this drama will never end, you will get through it and come out the other side as a stronger person. One day, this period of your life will be nothing but a bad memory. Cliché, but true - take it from another person who had an awful coming out. When you get a chance, be sure to check in with your friends here on EC to let them know how things are going.
     
  10. Hawk

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    I'm so sorry Kodo, I hope things get better for you. We'll be thinking of you, and stay strong. (*hug*)
     
  11. Aussie792

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    I'm very sorry to hear this. Stay strong and remember that this is ultimately about you and your mental health - not about your parents' unnecessary pain. Do not let them make you feel guilty or to blame. And no matter how hurt they feel, remember that to let them brush the issue aside and pretend you never said it, which is an unfortunately common reaction, is to prevent you from living openly and honestly. Very little is worth that sacrifice, so try to stay firm.

    You will weather this. Even if it feels like an eternity before you come out on the other side, you will do it eventually and you will feel so much freer. I'll keep you in my thoughts.
     
  12. BlueLion

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    You are in my heart, in my mind and in my prayers. (*hug*)

    I'm sorry to hear that. You haven't broken anybody's heart. I'm sorry but it's what I think. They just need some time to understand you. (*hug*)

    I hope your pain is eased soon. (*hug*)

    Be strong, friend. (*hug*)
     
    #12 BlueLion, Jan 4, 2016
    Last edited: Jan 4, 2016
  13. MrPistol

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    I'm am so sorry this has happened to you! I would be devastated if this had happened to me. I not too sure how my heart would take something like this. I will keep you in mind and hope it all works out for you. Please keep us posted on how things are going. We all love you and hope it gets better. I know I have many things to work on myself but I can't do it on my own. I need the help as well. Peace and hope you get through it soon.

    Friend
     
  14. JackIsANerd

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    Stay strong Kodo you will get through this we are all here for you. (*hug*)
     
  15. dylanisawsome19

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    I hate seeing stuff like this... I'm so sorry this happened and my best wishes for you... Some parents don't understand or refuse to understand the struggle. Please stay strong and when possible keep us posted
     
  16. kageshiro

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    Good luck, friendo.
     
  17. thepandaboss

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    I just saw this. And I don't know when you'll get to see this but I'm so fucking sorry this happened to you man. No one deserves to be treated like that. That's how my mom acted when I came out. (and this was under my old account on EC). The mods can help change your password and log you out of other devices if for whatever reason you don't have the ability to get to everything. I urge you to use libraries and friends' computers whenever possible, at least for everything else you might need a computer for. Do not hesitate to look for shelters or legal help if things get worse. Do you have a friend you can stay with? Please consider that. The important thing right now is staying safe. You're going to get through this and I only hope that one day soon your family decides that your happiness is more important than potentially losing you.

    My thoughts are with you.
     
  18. Alder

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    I’ve been quite out of the loop recently in regards to EC, but I just saw this post as well and I want to just say that you did not and do not deserve the tough times you’re in right now, and I hope that you know we’re all rooting for you and that you’ll make it past this point. It’s not your fault. Please hold on, we’ll all be thinking of you.

    Stay strong, brother.
     
  19. randomconnorcon

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    Holy shit, man. I'm so sorry this is happening to you. Know that we're thinking of you and supporting you in a way way you can.

    Stay strong, friend. I know it probably sucks right now, because they're your parents, but don't let them get to you negatively.
     
  20. Burnedcloset

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    I really hope for the best for you. Things like this shouldn't happen.

    You must overcome this tribulation. Do whatever you have to. If you can't get online for support try to find friends who will supports you in real life.

    All the best,
    John