I have made a conscious choice that I need to lose my virginity urgently. Don't convince me that I can live with it any longer, I believe given my personal circumstances that nothing else will move forward in my life until I can just stop worrying about dying before I get to do it and worrying about how I'm the lasta one of my friends who have done so. This needs to happen, and soon. With that being said, how can I possibly go out and hook up when so many men have AIDS? I'm so scared. I feel like gay sex is just too dangerous. What was the statistic, like 25% of gay men have AIDS? Is this even doable? How does anyone have gay sex knowing this, even with a condom? I just can't get over it. I also feel like I really can't trust anyone in this group. Any time I try to meet online (which is my only option in farm country), I feel like they're going to kill me, like I just can't trust them. Is there a middle ground here that I'm missing? And again, don't try to convince me to remain a virgin.