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How safe is it for LGBT people?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by crystalbal, Apr 8, 2021.

  1. crystalbal

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    This question is in particular for people who are living in countries where same-sex marriage is legal.
    Eg. Australia, New Zealand, Canada, France, Germany, U.K etc.

    Do LGBT people still face hate crimes or attacks from homophobic people in these countries where same-sex marriage is legal?

    Also, do LGBT couples face abuse from the public if they are intimate or display PDA in public?

    Also, were there cases whereby services were refused to LGBT people based on discrimination? (eg. refusing to serve them in restaurants or shops etc.)

    I am from an Asian country and same-sex marriage is not recognised here. I am just curious to know about the situation faced by LGBT people in these countries.

    Thank you.
     
  2. QuietPeace

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    I lived in California in the USA. I had someone try to murder me and the police just laughed at me about it.

    I do know some people who would hold hands or even kiss in public but I would be afraid to there.

    I have also been discriminated against by doctors and refused medical treatment.
     
  3. AimLew

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    Hi! UK, London!

    It still very much exists, people are still extremely homophobic and hate crimes happen. A couple of years ago a lesbian couple were assaulted physically by a group of people on a London bus because of their sexuality.

    Cases where people are refused service are VERY rare, there would be public uproar. But one bakery in Belfast refused to make a cake for a gay couple because of their religious views on homosexuality and the bakery actually won the ruling at the Supreme Court.

    I think we’ve made a LOT of progress and our country is nowhere near as bad as some other places in the world at all. We’re extremely fortunate actually. But we still have a hell of a lot of work to do.

    :gay_pride_flag:
     
  4. Unsure77

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    My home state in the US actually just passed a string of anti-lgbt laws. They explicitly made it legal for doctors and EMT’s to refuse medical care for lgbt people and banned gender affirming care of any kind for trans kids (among a string of other bills). So...probably not very safe.
     
  5. Chip

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    It depends not just on the country, but on the locale within the country. For example, as much as people think of California as super liberal and supportive (and in many areas, it is), QuietPeace's experience is far from unique here, especially if you get out into the boonies. For the most part, in most places in the world, if you're in a larger metropolitan area, you are likely to find greater and more consistent acceptance. But even there, you can run into groups of people who still think hate crimes are OK.
     
  6. Unorthodog

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    I live in a small conservative town in Ohio and there seems to be a lot of homophobes here. Probably not terribly safe, I don't think they care what the marriage laws are. I think it's about knowing what places to avoid - I wouldn't say my life is in danger necessarily but the attitudes of the area also don't necessarily "feel safe" either.

    I don't think I'd be denied service from places in my area, but I have much less faith in the people themselves.
    Not being denied service is one thing, someone taking up an issue with you on their own time in a small town is another.
    Who is to say what may or may not happen? It's not so easy to know.
    All we can really do is put our faith in society and avoid people we're unsure about.

    Many times I will simply feel uneasy due to the types of people around me and the views of the area. Wether that means anything, I couldn't say.
    I certainly know of people around me whom have a distaste for the LGBT+ community. When performing PDA certain people do give you looks and talk to you about it. Not sure if you'd agree but I'd classify that as abuse from the public when displaying PDA in a public area.
     
  7. ShyBirdy

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    I'm in British Columbia, Canada. In the larger cities, it's fairly safe, but there have been occasional physical attacks there too. I would say that most people are ok, but you definitely run into homophobia here and there. Not sure what it's like in the smaller, and more rural areas. Canada is huge, and most of it is sparsely populated. I'm only familiar with the large cities, which are mostly fairly safe- but not perfect by any means.

    Honestly, it's this sort of stuff that really makes me not want to be gay. (I know I can't choose my orientation- but I already face discrimination based on other factors, and it's depressing to think that I'm just going to face even more now.)
     
  8. johndeere3020

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    I live in a small town in Minnesota. I don't hang a flag on my door or anything like that but a don't hide it anymore. There are still dense people around but attitudes are slowly changing. My wife and I feel safe in our home for the most part however having grown up in a rural setting there is a weapon in my night stand. Mostly because of the meth dealer down the street.

    D
     
  9. sojabohnenfeld

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    - yes, marriage is legal but we still face attacks
    - in my area, people will stare
    - some people will ignore/avoid/disrespect you if you sound, act, or look gay so it is possible

    I feel 100% safer as a man than as a woman and many of my friends will confirm, and we are living in a somewhat large, urban area, in a dying part of the midwest of the usa. So for me I feel safer than my straight female friends.
     
  10. maybon

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    There’s also what I’d call metaphysical hate crimes which for people trying to live in some form of faith or belief can be very damaging.
    I try to do the whole faith thing, God help me, as a Catholic.
    If I’m true to myself well, on the pilgrimage of life, I’m told I’m not fully human, my place is at the back of the coach. If I try to sit at the counter of daily bread, I’m pushed down to the far end. If I dared to show up with a partner there’d be no stool for me at all.
    No doubt the Swiss Guard are at the pearly gates and if I turn up in my poodle skirt and bobby socks it won’t matter how many bibles I have under my arm they’ll turn me away.
    And while these brigades of old men obsess about what’s in our pants there’s plenty use their words to excuse physical violence to the point of death. And some poor souls led to hate themselves so much life's unbearable. That’s a crime.
     
  11. sojabohnenfeld

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    This.

    This is completely true for the USA, too. We grow up with endless messages about how religion brings out the best in people. And it does. You see yourself surrounded by so much good, and ask, why am I left out? But this side often isn't told. It is terribly damaging to grow up lgbtq in a religious area, even in the us.
     
    #11 sojabohnenfeld, Apr 26, 2021
    Last edited: Apr 26, 2021
  12. OGS

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    I'm in Chicago and haven't felt like being gay was a safety issue for me for probably at least 20 years.
     
  13. Andrew99

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  14. crystalbal

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    Thank you for sharing members.

    I had the wrong assumption that there won't be any hate crimes or abuse against LGBT people in countries where gay marriages are legal.
     
  15. Minnie03

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    I might be moving to British Columbia in the next couple of years, hopefully to somewhere like Victoria (or maybe Vancouver) as my partner wants to study there. Would you mind sharing some more of your experiences or what you know about how things are in general as I don't know too much. I'm hoping that with the recognition of same-sex relationships, there will be some legal protections in place at least and that things will be a bit better than where I am at the moment, where same-sex relationships are not only not recognised legally, but people seem to feel like they're not even real relationships and that two people of the same sex or gender can't really be together. I'm hoping that my partner and I will be able to live a bit more freely as ourselves if we do move to Canada, even if there are obviously still some people everywhere who aren't so nice.
     
  16. HM03

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    Smallish town in Ontario - and I haven't heard or experienced anything physical here (not to say it hasn't happened). Its more the occasional dirty look or double take. People can have their negative opinions but typically won't say it to your face if they know you're LGBT.

    While same sex marriage has been legal here for 15 years, I feel like attitude and how "taboo" it is has gotten significantly better since the 2000s.

    As other's have said, it really depends on the specific area in the country. My experience could easily be different than somebody in a much smaller/larger city or in a different province :slight_smile: