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How often do you go on dates/hookups from online apps?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by blogger100, Jun 22, 2018.

  1. blogger100

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    I don't have my face up on those apps so I have never been on a date around my city, but when I travel overseas I do put my face up which makes things easier.
     
  2. Destin

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    I've never used a gay app - except to just look around and see how it worked once out of curiosity.

    I have extensively used the most common straight dating app that starts with a T when I thought I was straight still though. When I wasn't in a relationship I'd meet up with someone from there about once a month. Figured out that it's total crap for dating, and also not the greatest for hookups either. It was like 5x easier to pick up a girl in a random bar than from the app. At least in a bar you're only competing against a few other people, on the app the attractive people are getting like 100 messages a day so barely anyone has a chance. I could get people to match me and talk to me a lot, but they were mostly all flakes and backed out of any plans at the last minute.
     
  3. Lesbibliophile

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    I'm only on one app. I'll end up pursuing something maybe a few times a year. Go on a handful of dates each time. So far not much has come of it, but I'm also still pretty inexperienced. Only once did it seem to be going anywhere, but even that derailed after a few months due to outside circumstances. Still, it's hard to find people in person without having the stress of wondering "Is she gay? Could she be interested? Should I try to make a move? If I'm wrong, will I die of embarrassment?"
     
  4. Denial

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    I tried a lesbian app once but didn't have much luck with it and never ended up meeting anyone in person.
     
  5. jackocards

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    Twice at the end of last year. Both ended badly so none for the foreseeable future
     
  6. BadassFrost

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    I don't trust online dating apps.
     
  7. kara123

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    I’ve never met anyone in person from one, I’ve been on out of curiosity but I’m still in the closet and I don’t want to bump into anyone who lives in my small town on there
     
  8. sonic1337111

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    Not yet although i have been thinking about it on multiple occasions
     
  9. smurf

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    I use one fairly regularly for the past 2 years. I usually try to have FWB so I usually meet up with a new person I would say every two months, but I only hook up rarely since the chemistry has to be there for me. I do have 2 friends with benefits that we meet regularly and 4 more people who we meet when it comes up or when they get into town.

    We have met some really great couples that way too. We have one couple who we hooked up once, but the sexual chemistry was sadly not there. We still go out to lunch every 3 months or so to catch up so its really nice.
     
  10. smurf

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    Oh duh forgot to mention! Way back when I started online dating I went on a date with this cute guy. We didn't hook up or date since the chemistry was not there, but months later he needed volunteers for an event and I agreed to go. In that event I met the guy who later offered me my first internship.

    I know online dating gets a bad reputation for many valid reasons (plus I've had my own set of bad experiences), but I always try to be vocal about how good it can be if you use it correctly.
     
  11. wannahavechange

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    Never I think it's skeezy and hella dirty. O tried it one time but could never have a meaningful conversation without the other guy wanting me to put out on first encounter. Seriously it's called a dating app for a reason not a free pass to bang like bunnies. Although that's just my opinion.
     
  12. Andrew99

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    It’s very hard for me to meet people on there that I think I would like.
     
  13. OnTheHighway

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    Safety, honesty, directness, staying on the moral high ground and being non judgemental are the keys to successfully navigating apps.

    Safety is priority number one. Use good judgement, engage and asks questions sufficiently to get comfortable with a person before you meet, look to meet in a public place, and if there is any signs of concern don’t hesitate to back away promptly.

    Be honest about what your looking for and what your own intentions are. This will help in finding better matches for yourself.

    Be direct in order to avoid miscommunication and confusion. Try not to be shy. By being direct and engaging with others, you may be surprised that what someone’s stated intentions amay in fact be covering a deeper desire for real connections.

    Always take the high road. This is not a competition to be the coolest person on an app, your priority should be to maintain high ethics and morals based on your moral code and expect the same from others. If there are signs from others that their morals and ethics do not align with yours, disengage from that person.

    Don’t judge others based on a photo (or a few) and a short written profile. Reserve judgement until you actually meet someone. It’s surprising how different people may be in person compared to how they present themselves online (and my experience has been usually more to the positive).

    I have followed these self imposed rules and I have met a bunch of great guys both for casual sex and for dates (and even for longer term relationships). Recognizing most apps are being used a large part for hook ups and casual sex, whatever it is your using apps for, there are others that are using them for the same exact reason. And yes, I also have had my fair share of misfires but have handled them promptly and respectfully.

    As I engage with people, and clearly explain what I am interested in, I find many others looking for the same thing. I do get my fair share of blocks and ghosting, but I do not let that discourage me from successfully navigating apps. I don’t let apps diminish my own self confidence or self esteem, rather I don’t take initial app discussions to heart and wait until I meet someone in person before making any of my own judgements about them.
     
  14. Mahidevran

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  15. nicecoolguy

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    Not often. Getting past the initial back and forth convo is the hardest part, I think. My luck has started to change recently though, in this past few months. I have been on a few dates and met someone great a couple of months ago who I will be seeing again soon.
     
  16. Xochipilli

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    Never, but I’ve thought about creating a fake profile just to see if I know someone on the gay sites/apps. I wouldn’t actually interact with anyone because cat fishing is super creepy. Just snoop around. :spy:
     
  17. Danabutton

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    I’ve been on and off one in particular mostly out of curiousity...I guess sticking my toe in the water....I like flirting but I would be scared as hell to actually meet somebody that way....
     
  18. Lin1

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    I go on dates fairly regulary, it depends a lot on my mood actually, there has been months where I have a date most weeks and then can go a few months without wanting to meet anyone so taking a break. Online dating apps aren't my favourites when it comes to meeting someone romanically but I did meet quite a lot of amazing girls on it ( I also met my ex through a dating app) and have met plenty of new friends, who like someone upthread mentioned, opened up quite a lot of opportunities for me ( be it work-wise and else :slight_smile: ).

    You just have to use them with an open mind and not much expectations.
     
  19. Kodo

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    I used to use the popular dating app. Went on a couple of dates, lots of flakes, a couple of disjointed conversations... One guy I met on there went to the same university as I did and we had a casual thing going on for a couple months after that. It isn't the greatest for forming relationships, and not even the greatest for hookups. I'm kind of over dating apps and taking a break from dating in general right now. There are more important things in my life.
     
  20. Ben35

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    One this year and was a disaster.