How did you meet your SO?

I know that it's hard to hide a relationship. How I managed to pull it off sucessfully for a while was working in the same city where she lived and waiting until I had errands to do. I managed to buy some time under those covers. I didn't like having to lie, but it was necessary (for safety reasons in our case).

 

I've met her on a dating website. On that site, you can answer questions and select how you'd like a potential partner to answer them. The website then shows you people that match in their answers and expectations. If you answer enough questions, that leads to pretty good results. That plus a persons photos plus profile description gives a good impression of the person. We met like March last year for the first time. We live like 300km apart, but there is a direct high-speed train connection. So in the average every two weekends we meet, and I usually stay at her place for a couple more days as I can work remotely. Our plans are to move together next year.

 

An interesting question for me, mostly because I am only just now coming out as transgendered, and currently single. I currently present as a straight male - and one of my biggest concerns about coming out is finding a partner who will accept me. Like you, I have no interest in a hook-up … but rather seek a long term partnership where intimacy develops. Although I know it happens all the time, I have zero confidence that anyone will accept it in my own case. Logically, I know from my own experience, this is not necessarily the case. My most recent ex (a girl I took to the prom 30 years ago - we remained friends and eventually we reconnected) bought me a dress that she encouraged me to wear out with her. (I didn’t come out to her, but I think she checked my internet history and realized what my searches pointed to). We broke up though because of control issues she had (exhibit one, of many - checking internet history without permission). Now, on the precipice of coming out publicly, I worry I may never have another partner and certainly have no idea where to meet one.