Because right now, I'm not. I think I'm starting to get past the depression and revenge-seeking thoughts that I had while trying to process coming out late. I'm going through a phase now that my hetero peers got to go through in high school. That really sucks, and I resent them and the entire world for it. Okay, that's where I'm starting from, and I think I've told everyone who I want to know. So how do I get excited about my present and future? What I'm going through is bittersweet, that's the best way I can describe it. Good that I'm finally getting to treat myself as a wonderful human being; sad that it's happening years later than it should have. Simply focusing on the positives won't make the negatives go away, and it won't make me forget about them either. They're still going to be there. So how do I truly start to feel really good?