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How are my chances?

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by Umbyr, Mar 22, 2015.

  1. Umbyr

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    So I just created this account and this is my first post, so sorry if it's in the wrong place, I tried to make sure it was. I'm a 16 year old gay male who is 100% closeted.

    Now to the point: I'm 6'4" and a total bottom. I'm not sure where I acquired an understanding that the bottoms in a relationship tend to be shorter, but it's something I just sorta assume. Not only am I going to be taller than basically any guy I meet, but I'm going to be vastly taller than a good percentage of them. Because of this, what are my chances of having relationship where I can be the bottom? Do some tops like taller bottoms? Or should I get used to topping?

    Thanks so much in advance.
     
  2. Hizaki

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    In this quite personal preference-driven world of gay men, I would assume that there are plenty of short tops (control fantasies?) as there are tall bottoms (like you).

    And remember, if you consider your theory of short bottoms and tall tops, somebody who is tall but not as tall as you (6'1" for example), is likely to be top anyways. Almost everybody is shorter than you. Of course, that's only if you are correct in assuming that tall men often prefer top, which I honestly have no idea either way.

    *shrug* I tried
     
  3. Umbyr

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    Thanks so much for your response. Hopefully there are plenty of both. Is there anyone out there with personal experience with this?
     
  4. Lawrence

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    I'm sure this is more about social stuff than technical difficulties. Some tops will be okay with it and some will not. It's their loss if they aren't okay with the height difference. I think Onyx Wolf makes a good point about personal preferences.

    A lot of things other than the height you happen to be, are going to affect dating. I would suggest you focus on things you can change/improve. You might be sick of hearing/reading about how important it is to have confidence (or you could be fine in that department), so I'll share a little trick. It might help to think about if you were room-mates with yourself and how cool/reasonable/etc you would find yourself.

    I think a lot of gay guys are versatile. Although I don't remember reading any statistics about this. It's just an observation.

    It's not quite the same, but, it might give you hope. I'm a switch. Mostly dominant. I'm 5'5". The tallest guy I dated was 6'1". It wasn't that weird except when he picked me up and I demanded to be let down.

    I thought nobody would treat my dominant side seriously. I'm not the first person to worry about something like that and I won't be the last. I think life will challenge those perceptions you have about height and roles!
     
  5. Chip

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    I have two tall friends, 6'3 and 6'5. Both are total bottoms. Both have been in happy relationships with tops much shorter. Height really doesn't matter.
     
  6. ffxii

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    Being active or passive has nothing to do with the person's height, but rather with their sexual preferences. Some people like taller guys, some people like shorter guys so don't worry at all about it. (;

    Lots of luck :slight_smile: