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Homeless Queer Youth

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Love4Ever, Nov 13, 2018.

  1. Love4Ever

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    So, I am not in a positon to do it right now, but when I get my own place, am financially stable, I would really like to do something about this. I have always been unsure if I wanted children because I didn't want them the traditional way. But I definitely would be open to adoption and the more I think about it the more I thought there probably is a disproportional amount of queer kids who are in the system who need homes and might not be chosen because they were "atypical." Plus, people want babies a lot and I don't want or care for an infant or a toddler. So kids who were gay and "too old" are probably looking for someone who would want them. But even though I am not at a point in my life now to take such a big step, I want to be helpful in smaller ways. Is there anyone here who has experience in working with queer youth who need help or how to get involved with ways to help them? Particularly kids who maybe don't have support or were kicked out of their home? I want to be able to do something because people's lives are so shaped by circumstance and people who are not as privileged as I have a much harder time.
     
  2. Chip

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    There's a lot of need in this area, sadly. A lot of kids still get tossed out because they are gay, lesbian or trans. And of course, there are kids whose parents are unable to care for them, kids who are in abusive homes. My guess is this will only get worse as parents are less and less prepared to raise children, and have their own wounds... and then those kids go on (if they haven't done their own self-work) to be equally bad parents.

    Here in northern CA, there are some pretty good resources: a number of youth shelters focused on LGBT youth and young adults, and a number of resources to help them, as well as to help kids who age out of the foster system. But we need more, for sure.

    You might consider becoming a foster parent once your own situation is more stabilized. One of the common misconceptions people have is that parents or foster parents 'pick' kids; a friend of mine who was a foster care placement specialist got exasperated with a prospective foster parent who "wanted to come by and meet a few of the kids", and had to explain that this isn't like the pound, where you 'wander through the cages and pick out the one you want.' At most placement agencies, a placement worker interviews the child and reads the file, looks at the foster families in the roster, and makes an appropriate placement based on the needs of the child and the strengths of the foster family. So it's a process of matching, rather than picking out, and the foster placement worker advocates for the child in finding a good placement. Interestingly, it is not the LGBT kids that are generally difficult to place; it is the ones with physical or mental disabilities, difficult social interactions or skills, aggression, and the like. Those are the ones who really need someone who is compassionate and loving and caring to help them... and often the ones where you'll see the biggest reward in terms of watching them grow and prosper.

    This isn't to say that LGBT kids in the foster system don't need good homes, only that, for the most part, they are not, by any means, the most difficult ones to place.
     
  3. PatrickUK

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    In the UK we have a registered charity working out of London, Manchester and Newcastle that places 16-25 year old LGBT in safe and stable homes/accommodation. Children under 16 normally go into the fostering system, but as many young people come out after the age of 16 and still find themselves facing hostility, danger or homelessness, it's necessary to give them a chance too.
     
  4. beenthrdonetht

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    In fact also at the pound, it's better if they pick you. My favorite creature in the world came right up to me and purred.

    Not to hijack this important and thoughtful thread. Thanks Chip for the comprehensive advice. And thanks all (who read) for your open hearts. Happy Thanksgiving all!
     
  5. Love4Ever

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    Yes, thank you for all the ideas! I appreciate the feedback. I am sorry I was distracted and didn't check back in on this until now.