I've never really done anything like this before, the chatrooms or admitting that I might be, bi or something. I've only had two boyfriends (small town) and one of them, lets call him Fang, he was nice and we were best friend. I broke up with him because I wasn't getting turned on by guys (I'm only 16), and you know Baby from Dirty Dancing-the part where she's practicing the steps on the bridge thing, yeah that happened when I was with him. So I called it off, but I'm lonely and small ignorant town- I can't come out. So yeah, I don't know. I've always been more comfortable around girls and I'm a comfort person, I don't really know how this is supposed to work. All I know is that when I imagine myself finally happy I'm with a girl.
Hi, Maximum, and welcome to this awesome corner of the internet! EC is a pretty great place, with a lot of members in similar situations to yours. Hopefully the community here can be a support network for you, and a place where you can be yourself, even if it's hard in real life. I also grew up in a tiny Midwestern town - no joke, I was related to almost half of my classmates (it made family reunions more fun)! And I get how hard it can be. Feeling like you're the only one. I do think it's harder to be LGBT and living in a small town, but it's not impossible. A lot of people, including people here, do it. And if you do decide to move away one day, there's a place out their for you where you can live your fully authentic life, whatever that may be. Finally, don't feel rushed to identify as a certain sexual orientation if you don't feel comfortable with one yet. I've spent half of my 23 years working through my gender and sexuality, and just recently accepted my identity. Questioning who you are is a natural, common, and worthwhile endeavor. Regardless of who you figure yourself out to be, that person will be stronger and better for it. I know that happiness seems far away, but it isn't. You should spend everyday fighting to be the best version of yourself that you, not your town or situation, wants you to be. Because no matter what, you're worth nothing less.
