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Hey there!

Discussion in 'The Welcome Lounge' started by Wanderlost, Mar 6, 2023.

  1. Wanderlost

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    Hi everyone. I just joined but have been lurking about for a few days trying to decide if I wanted to register. This seems like a nice friendly place so here I am!

    About me. I'm a pansexual, cis female, college student. Pronouns: she/her/my name. Currently studying in the states but originally Icelandic. I love reading, writing, a bit of gaming, going to the beach, and hanging out with friends, which makes me sound outgoing, but I'm more introverted and sorta awkward socially, but I keep trying! I'm out to everyone who knows me well enough but I don't really show my pride, which is something I'm working on. It's a little culture shock where I am now compared to where I'm from so I'm not used to being outwardly queer, if that makes sense? I look forward to making some new friends here.
     
  2. xfemmelesbian

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    Hi, i’m Loz!

    Welcome to EC :slight_smile: it’s nice to meet you.

    What do you study at college? I have never met anybody from Iceland, it looks like a very beautiful country.

    I’m an extrovert! if you have done the 16personalities test, I am an ENFP. I’m a cisgender woman in her twenties.

    I can imagine it must be a bit of a culture shock coming to America to study. I am not personally from America but where I am from (England, UK) people are also open about their queerness for the most part, especially in some areas. I hope you enjoy your time studying in America and if you want like to chat, feel free because I love talking to new people! :slight_smile:
     
    #2 xfemmelesbian, Mar 6, 2023
    Last edited: Mar 6, 2023
  3. Wanderlost

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    Oh thank you! I was just reading your thread about wanting to propose to your girlfriend. That's so cool! Anyway, I wasn't very clear and wanted to edit my post but either you can't or it was too late. I'm used to a more open view of queer people than where I am now. But the truth is I'm sort of a wimp about it and need to find my courage. Oh and about chatting. I can't do that yet right? I'm too new still. I'm studying design engineering.
     
  4. quebec

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    Wanderlost.....Hello and a great big LGBTQIA+ welcome to Empty Closets! :old_smile: I can remember the first post that I made on EC. I was desperate for help and I got the help that night that I so needed. I hope that we can help you in the same way that I received help. The most important thing to remember about Empty Closets is that we do care about you! We're very glad that you found us here on EC and hope that we can answer questions, give you support and provide a place to vent (as long as it's not violent!) :old_big_grin: when that becomes necessary!

    *****There are 18 different sub-forums here that you can check out and join in the conversations or start your own thread/conversation. I don't think that I've ever talked to someone from Iceland before...so this is a first for me! :old_smile: I used to be quite shy also...until one of my college friends dragged me into a theatre production. I got bit by the theatre "bug" and discovered that when I was on stage I could be someone else...not the shy me, and soon my shyness was history! EC is a great place to find friendly people who understand you. When I first joined I was in need of a lot of support and encouragement and I found it here. I hope that you'll find good things here too! :old_rolleyes:

    Some info on how to navigate EC:
    When you have made at least 10 posts on various threads you will be able to post messages on a member's Profile Page. Just click on a member's Avatar Picture and then click on "Profile Page" in the dialogue box that pops up. You'll then be on their Profile Page and there will be a box that says: "Write Something" When you have been on EC for a few weeks and have made at least 50 posts on various forums, you can apply for Full Membership. A Full Member can send Private Messages (PM) to other Full Members and share personal contact info. Right now you can only send a PM to a Staff Member as that is always possible. Here is a quote from the Full Membership information forum: :old_cool:

    *****To be eligible you must be a member of Empty Closets for a minimum of two weeks, and have a minimum of 50 posts. These posts must be across numerous forums (Fun & Games does not contribute to post count), and consistently posted across a minimum of two weeks. You wouldn't be eligible, for example, if you registered, had no activity for two weeks, and then returned to post 50 times on your 14th day of membership.

    *****Well, as I said, we're very glad you found us! :old_rolleyes: If you have any questions at all, you can always send me a Private Message.

    .....David :gay_pride_flag:
     
  5. xfemmelesbian

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    Aw thanks! I am thinking of proposing on her birthday. Oh okay, are there are any LGBTQ+ places near you? I can understand about feeling like a wimp (you’re not a wimp in my opinion by the way :blush:) because I was not open about my sexuality for years due to compulsory heterosexuality but now I am extremely open and don’t care but I do still get times where I get scared about being open. I’m sure you will get to that point too if you wanted to! Do you have any LGBTQ+ friends in real life? They might be able to help. You can write on peoples walls on their pages once you have posted 10 replies in total to threads! That sounds interesting, what does the course entail?
     
  6. Wanderlost

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    Hey, thank you David for the nice welcome and all that good info. you actually helped me out because someone sent me a message on my public profile and I found no way to respond and felt a bit lost. now I know I have to wait a bit, so I hope that person isn't put off by no non-response! I'm not ignoring you, I promise!

    Hey again. A birthday proposal sounds perfect, what a gift that would be. I'm sure she will like unwrapping it! :wink:
    There are clubs and groups I can join here that would help me I think, but I'm only just beginning to be more aware of my surroundings. I do know one lesbian friend who doesn't go to my university but she goes to one nearby. We've hung out a few times but I feel like an intruder because she has a girlfriend who is jealous I think, even though there is no real worry for her. So I try to respect her space. So with my closer friends here I'm the only queer one as far as I'm aware. I have a best friend back home who is Bi, and I talk to more than once a week, but rarely about lgbtqia+ stuff. This is one of the main reasons why I am here. I need an outlet for my queerness I think. You are very kind.
     
  7. quebec

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    Wanderlost.....You can edit your posts, but only for about 5 minutes...I think. Anyway, it's a pretty short time so it's best to proof read your posts before you actually post them! :old_smile:
    .....David :gay_pride_flag:
     
  8. Mirko

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    Hi there, and welcome to the community! It is wonderful that you have decided to join and post. :slight_smile:
     
  9. Jakebusman

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    Hi welcome showing pride takes time at least it did for me
     
  10. Lo The Froggo

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    hi! im Lo :slight_smile:
    im still relatively new here but welcome to EC!
    im glad youre working on showing your pride and maybe one day youll get to the point where you automatically show your pride without having to think about it
     
  11. xfemmelesbian

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    I’m sure she will haha! That sounds cool, do you think you will join at some point? Oh I hate it when people get unnecessarily jealous. But I would be exactly the same as you and just respect her space, do you still talk to your friend? I hope you manage to get to a point where you can express your queerness in real life if that’s what you want to do? It’s so liberating. Aw thanks! :slight_smile:
     
  12. Wanderlost

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    Hi back Mirko and Jake! Jake I saw you said hello on my profile but I can't respond yet because I don't have 10 posts, but soon!

    Hey Lo, That's a really good point, and to be honest that's sorta what I would want to do instead of trying to think of clever ways to do so, which if fine, no judgement on those who do that, but to me it seems sort of artificial. I want my expression to be me, and not some copycat of what another might do in my place.

    I might join a club next year, which is in the Autumn. Right now I'm just trying to survive, haha. I've only been in the states for less than a year, and being introverted doesn't help me at all. Americans are really quite different, but I mean that in a good way really. But it is hard for me to get comfortable because of this.

    Expression is something like a big mural to me that encompasses a great many things, and my gender, orientation, queerness, pride, all that, is a part of the whole. I am good at expressing me in many ways, but as a pansexual person it isn't very easy for me to grasp what that means yet. But don't misunderstand me, I'm not shy about, or afraid of my orientation, but right now I feel like just when I was getting comfortable with that part of me, I went and moved to another country and culture. So that plays into it a lot as well. I think the more I talk about it the more confused I get, and sound, sorry.
     
  13. xfemmelesbian

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    That sounds cool :slight_smile: aw! Oh you’re an introvert? I’m in extrovert and will talk to literally anyone because I love meeting new people haha, do your know your personality type? I’m an ENFP! Yeah I can imagine it must be a big change.

    Oh yes I completely understand you now!
     
    #13 xfemmelesbian, Mar 8, 2023
    Last edited: Mar 8, 2023
  14. Wanderlost

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    Back to another question you asked and I forgot to answer and for some reason still can't find the edit button, Yes, I still do stay in touch with my local friend here, is that who you were talking about? I just don't message her everyday like I would probably want too because of her girlfriend. I see her twice a week, between three and five pm, on Thursdays and Saturdays.

    It's been a really long time since I took one of those personality tests so I don't know exactly what I am. INTP? I'm also pretty in the middle on introvert vs. extrovert. 45% extroverted, 55% introverted. I'm not a total shut in, haha. There is a pragmatic side of me that knows it's good for me to be out and socialize, so I do so, even if that's not what I might want to do very often. I do usually have a good time when I get out of my comfort zones because I like a challenge.
     
  15. xfemmelesbian

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    Yes that is who I was talking about, aw i’m sorry you feel like you can’t message her every day but I do understand why you feel that way.

    You’re the only INTP I have met haha. Oh wow, I just checked and apparently I am 91% extroverted. I’m glad you have a good time when you go out! :slight_smile: I am a very social person so I love to go out and be around other people
     
  16. Wanderlost

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    It was a bad joke but the way too specific days and times I see my friend is not true. I can be very odd. We see each other about twice a week, not on any specific schedule, haha.

    I'm not sure how much relevance I give to those personality tests. I think I'm a skeptic, but probably for a flawed reason since I'm not a psychologist or psychiatrist. But I think it's possible that how we think others see us is not how they actually see us. The questions that have to do with how we feel are probably accurate though.
     
  17. xfemmelesbian

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    I think I must be being stupid but it may also be because it is almost 1:30am but I don’t understand what you mean haha, sorry!

    I think I do believe in them because everything I have read about my personality type describes me perfectly haha. I think the tests themselves were actually created by psychologists too but I may be incorrect. Yes I think you are correct that the way we think others see us may not actually be correct!
     
  18. Wanderlost

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    At 1:30am everyone is entitled to have a brain fog, but honestly what I said was pretty confusing at any time of day so no worries.