Hi guys! I'm a teenager questioning my sexuality (straight? lesbian? bi? very possibly a sexual/romantic mismatch). I already dress in a pretty masculine way and I'm considering getting a short haircut and really want to wear even more masculine or stereotypical butch clothing (which is somehow making my sexuality harder to figure out), and at some point I might try they/them. But for now I'm going by feminine pronouns. I'm very lucky to live in an open minded area and be surrounded by supportive people. My question for you guys is: when you were questioning, what were the tip offs to your identity, whichever way you eventually decided?
Hello, and welcome to EC! We have two subforums on this topic with many experiences from other members. https://forum.emptyclosets.com/index.php?forums/sexual-orientation.139/ https://forum.emptyclosets.com/index.php?forums/gender-identity-and-expression.140/ Personally, I only knew I was gay after about a year or so into puberty (maybe age ~13-14). I previously thought I was straight like "everyone else", but I learned quickly I could not stop my same sex attractions. I was more of a bookish kid interested in art and music, so I never really felt pressure to start conforming now to some hypermasculine gender norm.
Also, every person's experience and timing is different. It's more important to just be yourself at any point in time rather than trying to fulfill other people's expectations for you.
Hello, and welcome to the community! For me, I found myself attracted to anyone, it didn't matter what their gender was or anything. If their personality was what I enjoyed and liked, I found myself attracted to them. As well I noticed that I had been drawn to both masculine and feminine clothing, and styles, which was hard because I couldn't just dress how I wanted to at the time.
Cool! So did you decide on pansexuality? I'm leaning towards homosexual/heteroromantic, I think, but either one of those things subject to change. Just curious, what have/haven't you decided about your gender and how it relates to clothing?
I decided on Demisexuality. It made the most sense for me since I only found attraction based on a person's personality rather than what they look like. For the gender, I figured that I was most likely Genderfluid but leaning more to the feminine side. I've decided that I am comfortable in any form of clothing as long as I like it, and it has to reflect how I feel internally, whether I am feeling either masculine, feminine, or both.
