So, hi! I'm kinda new here, I already read some threads in the past but never made an account or something. Well, I'm getting a Lil confused about some things and if I could get some help it would be lovely. I'm gay, or at least that's how I feel, like even if I already came on terms with that I still feel sometimes that I'm somehow lying to myself(I feel like that maybe because of every thing that ppl said about homosexuality when I was a kid? I think), and I'm thinking if that's something I should worry. Okay now, there's just this last thing. Normally when I masturbate I feel excited and etc (when younger I first watched gay porn and felt so good, but I had a strong homophobia I think, bc I would stay in the bath saying things like "it's wrong! You shouldn't be like that! Sinful!", anyway), but recently while watching the same things I didn't felt the same excitement as before, and the thought that I'm maybe lying to myself strikes again, so I ask: is it normal to don't feel excitement?(If this change something, recently too I was dating a guy{long distance relationship}, but a lot happened and we broke up, but² I still kinda like him romantically, so could it be the reason of why I don't see pornography or etc the same way I did? Because of this love?). Anyway, if I could get some help it would be nice, thanks! ^^
Over time your sexual desire may change for a number of reasons. It is hard to narrow it down to a single reason without careful consideration. For example it could be due to depression/anxiety, grief, stress, poor physical health, being overweight, alcohol, medication..... the list goes on. If your excitement at certain types of pornography is the only area that you have noticed a change then again it could be a number of reasons. Sometimes peoples sexual desires, fantasies, fetishes, can change. For some people there is an element of desensitisation to pornography e.g. each time a higher degree of risk, surprise, excitement is required. Maybe the idea of pornography just doesn't compare to the idea of genuine intimate contact. Ultimately it doesn't really matter so long as it isn't causing harm to your relationship or sexual health. Where there is a need to seek help is if you feel the underlying issue is a mental health problem or unresolved personal issue. In this case you should perhaps consider seeing a doctor or therapist that can help you resolve the issue. Physical, mental and sexual health are each dependant on the others so equally as important to take care of.
