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GSA at my school: should I go?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Sparky2002, Oct 27, 2020.

  1. Sparky2002

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    So I go to a very liberal school. I feel like a lot of my school does some things to seem more appealing to people who are considering going to the school, rather than just doing it to benefit the students. For example, rather than actually accepting enough people of color students, they just have endless conferences that make everyone uncomfortable but look really good on a website. So their newest addition is a GSA (gender and sexuality alliance). All my friends know I'm lesbian, but most of my class doesn't know and I wouldn't mind if they knew at all because it's pretty obvious and I know they wouldn't bully me. If they did, my school would treat it very well and I know that my parents would also support me and I know I'm lucky to feel totally fine having everyone I know know. The thing is, I would actually prefer it that everyone knew because I hate having to make sure who I'm around and double check everything I say, but I don't really feel like telling them because I feel like it would be awkward and just something I don't really want to do. If I went to the GSA, they would know without me having to tell them and it would just be better. However, I feel like 1. I don't really need a GSA because I have never really been bullied for being lesbian (mainly because only my friends know) and 2. I go to a really small school so I don't think there would be more than like 10 kids. Also, as I mentioned before, I sort of think that it's something the school is doing to seem appealing and I would just be like a living advertisement for them. My school is one week online and one week in person also. I don't know, I feel kind of torn and I don't even know if it would be after school and remote or not.
     
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  2. QuietPeace

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    The GSAs that I have heard about said that it stood for "Gay/Straight Alliance" and with that it would mean that showing up could just mean that you are open minded.

    They also were not support groups as in helping people to deal with bullying etc, though they can help with such things if necessary. They were about socializing with like minded people. I have always found that being in a group of other LGBT+ people was pretty nice. For much of my life I socialized with such groups (there were no GSAs when I was in school).

    Since you pretty much have no risk if you go why not go and see if it might be something fun?
     
  3. LostInDaydreams

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    Hi @Sparky2002,

    Most of your concerns seem to be around the schools motives and number of students that will be there, so could you commit to attending once or twice and if you find it’s not for you, then stop attending? Going once doesn’t mean that you have to keep going.

    Also, could you ask a member of school staff for more details, e.g. whether it will be virtual or in person, how the meeting will be structured, etc.?
     
    #3 LostInDaydreams, Oct 28, 2020
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  4. BiGemini87

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    I definitely don't blame you for hesitating; the idea that they're tokenizing any group of people for clout is pretty unappealing. I'd say give it a chance, though; research it beforehand, speak to a counsellor at your school perhaps. If you attend and it's not for you, there's no pressure to keep going.
     
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  5. mnguy

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    That's great you have supportive people around you and the chance to be in such a group. Sounds like you could be really helpful to others who are having a tougher time. Regardless of your school's motives, I wish all schools had a GSA and people willing to attend to be visible for those who can't yet which might help them feel more confident. You'll figure out what's right for you.
     
  6. quebec

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    Sparky2002.....Perhaps a little more information about the group would help you with your decision. Some questions you might ask: 1) Who will be the "sponsor" of the group? Will this person be a faculty member(s) or an outside person such as a therapist, psychologist, Doctor, etc.? 2) What is the planned format of the meetings? Will there be an open Q & A format, a lecture format, etc.? 3) What will be the relationship of the student's parents to the group? Will the conversations be more confidential or will parents have access to everything that is discussed? There are probably more questions, but those are the ones that pop up in my head right now. Finding out more about the plans for the group before you participate would likely be a good idea. Congrats on you being you in high school...sometimes that can be difficult! Please keep us updated on how this all works out!
    .....David :gay_pride_flag:
     
  7. I am Cy

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    Only go if you feel safe. After the year book came out at my school people started targeting all members in the club. Including the straight ones.
     
  8. Tightrope

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    This is unconscionable. This happened in recent years? I am sorry to hear this.

    For the OP, I would say to do it if you feel safe, if you feel it furthers your goals, and if you think you might make new friends or make friends from knowing people in the alliance (when people introduce you to other people). It's a weird way to make new friends but introductions have worked for me when the people doing the introductions knew that the personalities would click.
     
  9. Sparky2002

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    Update: I went to the first meeting on Monday over Zoom. There were about 10 kids there and two teachers and I knew most of the people there. It was VERY relieving to see people had similar experiences to me, and I really enjoyed it. I was super shy and didn't say anything the whole time but it was still nice to feel less alienated. Also, it's happening every Monday, so now Monday's aren't so bad! Thanks for the advice.
     
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  10. LostInDaydreams

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    Good for you for going along. :slight_smile: Great to hear that it went well.
     
  11. Mirko

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    It's great that you decided to give it a try and attended a meeting. Glad you enjoyed it and found it to be welcoming, inclusive. :slight_smile: