Im feeling unhappy a lot recently, more than average. The average is usually during school days when I wake up, slug through the day, talk to some friends and then get home, sit down and do nothing. On top of that I procrastinate, not wanting to leave my comfy abode that is my room. More recently I've been more careless in school work, and it only gets worse. Over the break it has been fun but I'm surrounded by happy faces and nice places on social media and only feel more discontent. I've been sitting down for the majority of the days and watching the corny Netflix shows finishing a season at a time. My mom and sister seem to be always working and never even want to talk to me. That is, when I'm not sitting alone in my room. I honestly don't blame though. My attitude has been decreasing and I feel I've become rude and more pessimistic. When my mom isn't working she urges me to talk to friends and try to go out and do fun things. I know she's trying to get me to be happy but I don't feel as close to my friends as I should be. It might because I'm gay and haven't told them yet, but It also seems like I don't have common ground with them. I'm outward and funny around my friends and other people, and glad for it but when I'm alone I brood over every little thing about me. I don't know if I need a best friend or a hobby or something but nothing seems to keep me happy for long. And as someone who can't drive yet :dry: my options to do things are limited and I'm feeling a little neglected. I just keep wishing and finding myself wanting a best friend to help raise my morale. So is there anything I could do?:help: Sorry for all the different subjects brought up.
Hey Gamer4now, You indicated that your withdrawal from your family and your friends might be related to being gay. That is not an uncommon scenario for many of us in the LGBTQ community as we journey to understand and accept our sexuality. You indicated that you are gay, so you appear to understand your sexuality, but there is a big difference between understanding your sexuality and fully accepting it. Part of fully accepting it will mean that you are comfortable with it and, while you may not broadcast it to others for various reasons, you won’t be unhappy or ashamed at being who you really are. Is there a chance that you could convince your mother to let you see a professional therapist? A professional could help you walk through what you are really feeling and provide you with coping mechanisms to keep you fairly level headed and hopefully prevent you from spiraling into full-blow depression. It really does sound like you could use a good friend or two, as well. But, as I’m sure you know, sitting alone in your room is an unlikely situation to result in you finding new friends. Clearly having some hobbies or interests that you can share with others would provide you some outlet and also increase the possibilities of finding new friends that you have a lot in common with. Are you currently in high school? If so, does your school have an LGBTQ club or a Gay-Straight Alliance that you could attend? You sound like you are unhappy with yourself. Are you mainly unhappy that you are gay or are you also unhappy about some of your other characteristics? Just some thoughts. ---------- Post added 30th Dec 2016 at 07:31 AM ---------- I just read some of your previous posts. Sorry, I should have done that before responding to this thread. Oh well. Anyway, I see that you've tried therapy before, but it sounds like you had a really awful therapist. The thing about therapy is that for it to be helpful/effective, you have to connect with the therapist to at least some degree. If you do to a therapist for a session or two and don't feel comfortable with that person, you best move is to find another therapist. Are you still seeing a therapist at all? Did you try another therapist after that awful one that you posted about back in March?
Currently I am not seeing another therapist, mostly because problems have been few and no big issues have arose. All the while saying that my moms always working and im at school so we don't see each other often. I will be in high school next year, however my dad is a teacher there and is from what i can tell at least a little homophobic. The school does have an GSA, but i don't hold much hope for that. And for being unhappy for being gay, it might not be that. I know I am and do not deny it to myself, but i still feel withdrawn from the people I am around. And to add to that i don't feel like i will ever be a desirable person to be with, so that impending reality brings me down from time to time as well. Thanks for the reply.
I can't offer much advice because I'm currently very depressed, but I wish you the best of luck dude. Try to hang in there. For me, staying busy helps. Keep your mind off things. Do you have a job? Try to get out and see people or do activities even if you have no motivation.
