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Gender Identity Help

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by YrasaGhost, Jun 10, 2020.

  1. YrasaGhost

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Metro Detroit
    Gender:
    Other
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Hello everyone! I'm hoping you may be able to help me out. For a little while now I've been questioning whether or not I'm still fully male when it comes to my gender. Well now I definitely think I'm much closer to non-binary than anything but I'm really not sure, because I'm pretty new to this whole thing. Here is what I know about myself that causes me to question my gender:

    - I feel comfortable wearing feminine clothes and outfits. I also like how I look in feminine clothes.
    - I still feel just as comfortable wearing masculine clothes and outfits.
    - I have little to no body dysmorphia. I have a full beard that I like having, yet I do wish I had a little less body hair.
    - I don't really feel male or female when I wear feminine clothes.
    - I am starting to feel comfortable with my current overall body shape, as I've been losing weight consistently.
    - I think I'm comfortable with both he/him and they/them pronouns.
    - Once I'm a bit more fit, I'm interested in trying and using shapewear to appear more feminine.

    I am looking forward to any information and help you can give me! Thank you very much!
     
  2. warholwendy

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Midwestern US
    Gender:
    Androgyne
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    It's good that you're thinking in terms of actionable steps. I would say don't worry about the label so much, just try some of the stuff you've talked about and see how it makes you feel.
     
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  3. YrasaGhost

    Regular Member

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    Questioning
    Out Status:
    A few people
    That's very fair and I think I will start trying some of the stuff I mentioned a bit more regularly. I know I probably shouldn't really care about labels or anything but as mentioned I'm very new to all of this. Nevertheless, thank you for the reply!
     
  4. sleepyboy

    Regular Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Canada
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Its hard living in a world that sees gender as a binary, honestly. Its a setup! I agree to not worry about the label. This is easier said than done because you can accept yourself as who YOU are, however when it comes to others, they need a much more simplified version to refer to you as because their minds are a little narrower.

    I just hope you know I'm 4+ years into my transition (ftm) and I'm still discovering new things about my gender identity. I know a lot of trans people are solidified within the binary as I was at one time. Sometimes I feel more non binary myself as well just because it gives me more space to be myself. I feel like I embody body masculine and feminine energy but I prefer he/him pronouns. I'm not sure if my experience helps you at all, if anything hopefully it just helps normalize it a bit. Just know there's nothing wrong with not having it all figured out! You don't owe an explanation to anyone and your experience with gender is intimate to you and only you. You don't need dysphoria to be trans, you don't need to know right away, you don't have to look/act a certain way to be trans. I hope you feel more comfortable soon in whatever form you take!!
     
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  5. YrasaGhost

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Thank you for the advice! And yeah I've definitely been giving it some thought and I know there are parts of me that I feel comfortable expressing that I haven't before. I'm just going to test the waters with what I think I'm comfortable with and just see if and how I evolve. There is definitely a prominent feminine side to myself that needs expressing. I'm definitely not going to worry about labels or anything like that and just try to be what I feel best represents me, like you said. I mean if people absolutely need to know what I am, I have no problem with just saying "non-binary" but beyond that I'm not going to worry about pigeon-holing myself into something. It's all just new and exciting to me that I'll be truly expressing how I feel.

    Thanks again for the advice and the reply! I really appreciate it!