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Gay/Lesbian people- do you perceive the sexual energy of the opposite sex?

Discussion in 'Anonymous Sexual Orientation' started by Anonymous, Jul 2, 2015.

  1. Anonymous

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    For me it is pretty clear that I can feel and respond positively to the sexual energy of women- I feel attracted to it.

    But with men I go from not being able to perceive their sexual energy on most days-they feel asexual/neutral to me which would make it consistent with being gay

    - to, on some days being able to feel their sexual energy- and being somehow unsettled by it- and really not being able to tell if I like it or not- but my response will not be completely neutral- I will not be 'blind' to their sexual energy, hence I am not sure if I don't classify as bisexual because of it.

    To make an analogy-with women it will be like smelling delicious food and feeling it could be delicious.
    With men it would be like being hungry and smelling some food- which would make me aware of how hungry I am- but then discovering that the food I am smelling is something I I was not keen on- or it has something I dislike in it - but nevertheless I ate it before to satisfy my hunger- so I briefly consider if I could maybe eat it again. <= does it classify as attraction?

    How do you perceive sexual energy of the opposite sex?
     
  2. Starwind78

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    First off, are you female? So, when you're talking about sensing the sexual energy of women you feel this is lesbian/gay?

    I don't really know what you mean about "sexual energy". Are you talking about how you feel toward them?

    Even if I were straight, I feel like a lot of women would seem to be more sexual because fashion is more sexualized for women from showing more skin to makeup.
     
  3. Anonymous

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    Yeah- I am female.

    I do feel like most of the time I am gay- attracted to women- neutral towards men, and I don't question my attraction to women. I know it is there.

    But sometimes I perceive the sexual energy of men as well- by which I mean they don't appear sexually neutral towards me.

    I am not sure if I am attracted to them- or if I perceive their attraction to me, and react to somehow. Its like being a tiny turned on- but at the same time being also a bit put off by it?

    Before I figured out I am mostly gay, I was with men in the past, and something always felt missing for me in sex/relationships, so I mostly feel that I am not bi because of it- but this unclear way of relating to men makes me worry that I could be bi- it makes me unsure about being "really gay", if that makes sense.
    Not that there is anything wrong with being bi- its just that it would not feel right to *me*.
     
  4. Anonymous

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    To add to this- I don't find male bodies attractive/erotic at all as such.
     
  5. Fallingdown7

    Fallingdown7 Guest

    I don't feel the sexual energy of any gender/sex, period
     
  6. Seagypsy

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    I feel the energy of bisexual people, I feel feminine energy in men and masculine energy in women, but in straight people, in fact most people, they feel neutral to me, so I am asexual towards the general population.
     
  7. Chicagoblue

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    I'm mostly gay in terms of my yearnings but I do find females attractive and get a feeling for their sexual energy. Women are very sexual. Of course men are too but it seems the female form and spirit sort of draws you in. Maybe I'm nuts.
     
  8. enjeruciel

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    I think you're likely lesbian. If men have little to no sexual or emotional attraction for you then I would say you are a lesbian. I think the fact that there's only a hint of something minuscule when it comes to men and that it's off-putting to you makes this distinction quite clear to me.

    I'm genderfluid, my female side is heterosexual, my male side bisexual. Both genders have a preference for men, making my female side heterosexual and my male side mostly homosexual, but my male side can be sexually aroused by females and may want to act on that arousal through intercourse, however the urge to act on it is somewhat minimal or only occurs in brief impulsive moments. The female side can respect and feel sexual attraction to women, but no romantic emotional stimulation from women, and the female side is uncomfortable with the idea of having intercourse with another female. This is what makes me think the female side is heterosexual. Like you there's something there, though it's something small and somewhat off-putting that pushes the female side in the other direction. The male side has the potential to feel romantic stimulation by a female but may not feel comfortable pursuing a relationship with a female.
     
  9. Purplefrog

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    In terms of "sexual energy" of men - when I did have boyfriends, they were never very overtly sexual, which I liked - as the idea of a guy lusting after me was weird and uncomfortable - almost like being around someone really needy which makes you want to run in the opposite direction.

    Whereas women's sexual energy - is well, just hot.
     
  10. Anonymous

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    Wow- you've just described me to a tee when you said it felt like being around somebody needy.
     
  11. Anonymous

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    the gender aspect you've described is really interesting- I would describe myself as androgynous- I am not sure if this qualifies as gender fluid- more like female, but with more gender-neutral traits & less particularly feminine ones.
    I've often felt weird about my gender in relation to men- kind of restrained? I've felt like men rejected my masculine side- it did not find expression in a straight relationship & because of this, I felt restrained. I also felt less feminine- like my femininity was called into question-
    I actually think it has to do with the fact that my personality is pretty masculine & when men liked it- they did not like the fact that I have a female body (breast +hips, etc), whilst when they liked my female body I've felt like I had to present a false front of 'nice' & sweet girl- which also felt kind of false. Either way I've felt like my gender could not find its true expression in a straight relationship

    So I wonder how you navigate your gender fluidity- with your attraction to men?
     
  12. eburian

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    I can relate.

    You are saying that you find women more erotic and hot than men but there are times when you're like.. men are attractive. but not as much as women.

    I used to wonder if I turned off my attraction to men. From my POV, never really been with a guy, been in a relationship with one but even when I was younger.. I felt like I was missing that connection piece especially emotionally.. but then a/g compared to the average person, my experience is limited. Still I view women, very differently, my crushes are wayy more intense. I haven't had a crush on a guy in a while and personally.. to this day, I still kind of see myself with a woman more.

    In all honestly, whatever you are and trust me, I totally get the questioning because I had for at least a couple of years, you will know in time. :slight_smile: The best advice I can give you if love yourself and be with who you want to be with especially if you make each other happy. :kiss:(&&&)