Hello my name is Axle and I am trying to find out and discover about who I am, I believe to be either bisexual, pansexual, genderfluid or bigender. I have had romantic love interests in men, women and non binary people. I have fantasized in being in relationship with said genders. Moreover, I have felt many different types of feelings, such as there are times when I feel very feminine or very masculine. I feel like one day I am a man but then the next I feel like a woman or neither a male or female and even I have had times feeling like I am both. In addition, I also have an interest in cross dressing and androgyny, most of the time I feel great wearing the clothes of the opposite gender and feel comfortable wearing the clothes of the same gender some of the time. At times I like to mix women and men's fashion although I have not done this in public as I don't feel confident enough. When it comes to the outside, I have only come out to very very few people I know. My family doesn't know, coworkers do not know, some of my friends do not know, and only very close friends know about my sexuality. However, I am continuing to love myself and find out about myself and want to know who I am and what I should do.
Hello again Axle! I think you've already taken the first steps in the right direction when you say that you are "continuing to love myself and find out about myself and want to know who I am and what I should do". Plus the fact that you have found us here on Empty Closets and have started a conversation...that's a big step too! Have you considered finding a therapist/counselor to talk to? When I first came out (here on EC) I had only Empty Closets as support for the first year I was out...no one else knew. It was great and I learned a lot...but there was something lacking. I managed to find a therapist that listed working with the LGBTQ Community as part of his practice in a town about 150 miles from where I lived. This was important for me as I live in a small town and I'm very well known. I needed to talk to someone, but I needed that person to be far enough away from my town that I would not be outed. That was one of the best decisions that I have ever made! I first talked to him in December of 2015 and I have talked to him on pretty much a weekly basis ever since. He has really helped me turn my life around. Please think about locating a therapist to whom you could talk. What shocked me the most about talking to my therapist is how he was able to show me that I actually knew the answers to my problems...he just helped me find the path to those answers and how to apply them in my life! Please think about this! Remember...you are apart of our LGBTQIA+ Family and we do care...please keep us updated on how this work out!! .....David
