Finally Did It

When I came out to my husband we had a rocky time too due to lack of understanding. I bought Ash Hardells book; ABC's OF LGBT+ this really helped. He even popped out the closet as bi not long after .

 

@Shell87, your post made me laugh at first, but the more I think about it it's heart-warming. Maybe a lack of understanding and compassion for others can be because of a lack of understanding and forgiveness for ourselves.

 

It's taken me some time and effort to understand that my coming out as bi isn't just about me. Much as I resisted accepting my bisexuality, I think my wife struggles to understand and accept how this affects all long-standing beliefs.

 

Thanks @SevnButton.

I would also add that actually even I took time to be.....what, your bi, hang on, what.
For you this had been something you've wanted to get out for so long but this is new to her, it alters the reality of things as she knew it. I'm sure given time things will get easier and a new kind of "normal"

Hot or not hot is definitely a fun game with a drink.
My kids think it's awesome he's bi, and my niece who's 14 plagues him with, he's so hot...don't you think uncle X.

 

Yep. I'm actually trying to take the plunge and come out as well to my family. You're very brave to have done it. I hope I can be as courageous. The weird thing is I know my parents won't care. They've said multiple times that they just want me to be happy, love is love, all that, and my mom I think is suspicious. But there's something about saying it in words that just feels strangely terrifying.

 

Well, if I had to choose a number, I actually feel like a Kinsey three, because even though men have always turned me on on a physical level, (I used to think I was straight) I want a woman for a relationship way more. I want a female partner. I feel like right now I would want a woman as a long term partner because I don't get men on an emotional level all that well.

 

What about you? I assumed you leaned towards women? What kinds of types of people do you like? I really am drawn to androgynous people of both sexes.

 

Not to barge in or anything but I feel the same way actually. Like, I want to come out to my family but at the same time I feel like I might not be taken seriously. I know they will be accepting though because I have various LGBTQ+ family members and my mom asked (on various occasions if I had a boyfriend or a girlfriend). I just don't know if I'm ready yet.

 

Same here. I have no idea why I am scared.

 

Maybe it's because the status quo is comfortable. There's something about the unknown that a lot us just don't like.

I came out as bi to my wife in July, but I'm nowhere near ready to tell my kids (ages 20, 17 and 10). My wife isn't OK with me being bi, and it feels like too much to try to work things out with at the same time as getting the kids comfortable with the idea.

 

It's weird how similar this is to me. Have several gay family members and have been asked once implicitly and once not so much if I was gay by my mom. I'm bi, but she was on to something. Still afraid I won't be taken seriously though.

 

Me too.

 

It sure doesn't seem hard to understand to me. Maybe it's like trying to understand ice cream if you've never had dessert, or understanding sunshine if you've spent your whole life in a cave.

 

Yup. I totally agree.