Feeling completely unhinged right now.

Bear Hugs!! Thank you for sharing the video.

Have you thought more about telling your wife or axing the beard?
I'm at work and haven't had a chance to read a lot of these posts, but I hope you're getting to a good place and that I've been thinking about you. I don't like that you've been hurting. I try to focus on other people or a project when I hit a wall and feel trapped. I have just been focusing on July because I'll have insurance finally and hopefully I can see a therapist and get the ball rolling faster.

My wife knows my situation and is on board, so I hope that yours will be supportive too. It has helped me quite a lot.

 

I had grown mine out much longer than the pictures I have, I used to have a 4-5 inch goatee at various times and it was just a little shield I carried. Surely a beardy dude can't be a lady, right? Haha. It did help hide "me" but I think it just caused me to prolong the inevitable.

I'm not sure your wife's orientation but mine is bi so that helps me. Even though she supports me part of me still wonder that when I finally start hrt and do what I need to - will she still be attracted to me as a person and not as the "man" she married.

I'm a spaz, did you say you have kids? I have a step daughter, but I'm the only dad she knows.

Do you think she will try to make it work (may depend on the length of your marriage)? Im sure its hard to wrap your head around, but sometimes people surprise us.

I'm glad EC is giving you some help but know that we need you just as much if not more.

 

Your beard might be the best on EC. You look like a poet/professor/musician. That would be a shame to chop off, but when/if the time comes give it a viking funeral!

No kids will help during transition. You can freeze your swimmers if you want kids down the line. I think its a few grand to do.

PS. I am super jealous of your hair because my genetics bloooowww. Wigs and maybe transplants in my future.

 

The 2nd one didn't load on my phone. You've got some good genes!

 

From Tim Gunn to Tim Allen. You had a little opening, but no face smashing or regrets - if you had been ready you'd have said something and its fine not to be. The little opportunities can add up and work in your favor though. She might say something that gives you more insight into how she feels and help you let down the force field of manliness.

Did you learn some tips? Did you learn more about yourself? That's most important. If you still are feeli ng like transitioning is for you then you're taking the right steps. Its sort of like window shopping, and you're just doing the leg work for the future.

<3 You got this chicka.

 

Hehe "cut off guard". Always have a chefs knife handy and get low!

Interventioned about your gender or something else? I'm sorry it bothered you.

I slept for almost 12hrs and woke up just now. I should be at work, but I dislike Mondays and my part time associate that works for me that day so I hide out.

 

Did they call you out like, " Hey you can't do this, bro its not right" or "Hey (name), we know you've been hiding something and its eating you inside out and we can tell you're not happy."

So you know my coworker too isn't he just the slowest non-helper ever? Lol

Get low indeed - signature material

 

I've just now begun to read your thread in its entirety. Got here. Read thr part about the girly little boy and people trying to make him a bro and started crying. I was that kid. Even last summer when my dad came to visit he made a comment to me about my wife that "I had him worried for a long time."
He thought I was gay and well he's right - but I'm more of a lesbian.

Onto the next one.

 

I read the post about the purity ring. Did it hurt more that you didn't get a new ring that was yours and "pure", that she got it without you or that you didn't get the reaction/bonding you hoped.

When I was in 2nd grade my mom bought me a little imitation amethyst ring that I wanted because I'm a february kid. I remember being so happy and wearing it everyday at home and then having kids wonder why a boy wore a ring and I told them it was my birthstone and my mom gave it to me. They never bothered me about it.

It was my first real ring that wasn't from a quarter machine and ever since then I was the kid with rings, bracelets, necklaces, earrings, lip rings, tie clips, cuff links and so on. Jewelry and feeling of expression it gives me has always been like an extension of myself and not for show. Most people don't know I have tattoos because I've never been a showy person and its all for me.

If my mom hadn't got me that ring I don't know if I'd be the same person. My grandma always bought me jewelry and ornamental things as well. I'm sorry that you didn't get to have that connection. I don't really know you that well, but I feel like if we had gone to school together wed have probably been friends.