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feeling alone.

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Incognito Girl, Nov 4, 2014.

  1. Incognito Girl

    Regular Member

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    Gender:
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    Sexual Orientation:
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    No offense to anyone: I feel so alone that I have to go to the world wide web to feel less lonely.

    I'm in a relationship. I think.
    My girlfriend was taken to a Christian boarding school by her parents. It's 15 hours away by car.

    I read the entire handbook. I can't send her letters or call her unless her parents declare me as a recipient. She can only send two letters and receive two letters from her parents the first few months. She gains privilege's as she progresses: unsupervised calls, send/receive letters from anyone, visit home more often.

    Her birthday is this Saturday. I bought her present in September. I don't know if she can have it.

    She's in there because of me. I don't know when we will communicate with each other again. If that will ever happen. I miss her so much. It hurts. I want to know how she is doing. What she is thinking. What she sees. What its like. If she's sleeping well. If she's eating. If she's not hurting herself. If she misses me as much as I miss her. I cant stop thinking of her. I am so worried. I hope she doesn't try to runaway. I read that it happens. If she does, she doesn't get any privileges.

    It's like a jail. From what I read.

    I cry myself to sleep. I miss her warmth at night. Now that it's getting cold. I miss her singing to me. I miss seeing her beauty everyday. I miss her laugh. I miss holding her hands.

    I get scared because I've been craving touch and have been having these thoughts of being with anyone so that I can feel something, imagining it's her. I don't want to do that.

    I should be the one in there.

    I feel like it will be good for her. They can help her more than I could ever have.

    I know she will be away from drugs and alcohol. I know she will be safe from men who have been hunting her down for the value of her body.

    I can only hope that she will feel the same for me when she's out of there, as she did before she was admitted.

    I love you. I miss you. Take care, beautiful. I'll be waiting.
     
  2. ForeverYoung000

    Full Member

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  3. Incognito Girl

    Regular Member

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    Thank you so much ForeverYoung000. I appreciate your time