Hello, My wife recently caught me watching gay porn. I typically watch both gay and straight porn, depending on my mood. I have since fallen into a pretty dark place. I’m constantly questioning my sexuality to the point where I’ve considered myself to be merely everything possible (good, bad, and really ugly.) I ruminate all day long about it (to a point of being unhealthy, I’m seeing a therapist and eventually a psychiatrist because of it.) I feel I probably fall on the spectrum of bisexuality but nothing fits when I say it and it all makes my stomach hurt. I’ve described these feelings to my therapist and she has even given me a chance to talk to a gay therapist. I don’t feel I identify with him either. He is a completely outed man. When I leave therapy I usually feel better for a day or so, then everything comes crashing down with obsessions again. To make matters worse I feel I can’t concentrate on what has mattered so much to me in the past, my wife and kids. I have shared so many great memories with them and for so long, nothing made me happier. I don’t think coming to terms with my sexuality will ever help anything. I feel I’ve lost the best part of my life and can’t get it back because of this battle. I want my old life back. Anyone else ever been in this space? I’m so depressed, obsessed, anxious, etc.