Ever been to a support group?

Don't worry.
From what I've heard support group can be unpleasant because of a lot of socially awkward and anxious people in there, but if you are yourself socially anxious, this might prove good and helpful for you, a safe environment to open up.

I think you should also get out to people if you are feeling lonely. Find a hobby you can share with others, get a summer job.

 

There's no support groups in my area so I've never been to one, but I do know what it's like to social anxiety so I just wanted to give you some advice regarding that.

You're making quite a few assumptions about the group you're going to be in: that all the people there will be cis, that the cis members won't be accepting, that everyone else already knows already and that you won't fit in. All of these might be true, sure. It also might turn out that there are a number of trans people in the group, that the cis members will be accepting, that there are more people who are new (the thing about any support group is that people come and go, so there's always new people coming in) and that you'll have a really great click with a couple or all of the people there. Or any variation thereof! But that possibility is being excluded entirely if you don't at least try. If you stay at home, you'll be sure you won't meet trans or accepting cis people to share your experience with or that you'll meet new people. Think about the worst that can happen, then the very best that can happen - then find something in between that. That what you'll find in between is what's most likely to happen.

My approach to things like this generally is: I force myself to go once. That's terrifying enough as it is. But you don't have to commit to it for the long term if that causes you too much anxiety. Go the first time, maybe set yourself some goals (in this case it could be to speak up at least once, to introduce yourself to at least one person before/after, to compliment at least one person for something simple like a shirt they're wearing, etc. they don't have to be big things!) because goals help you focus and keep your mind occupied a little. If it ends up being uncomfortable - you don't have to go back again. People are not going to remember from meeting you just once so if you embarrass yourself, you can just disappear from the support group altogether! After the one session, just re-evaluate. Did it turn out to be better than you thought? You can go again. Was it every bit as miserable as you thought? You don't have to go again. Looking at it like that breaks the big, massive thing (going to a support group with the risk of being uncomfortable every single time) into much smaller steps (going just once, risking max one evening of discomfort).

Like emerry said, a lot of people are likely to be anxious there, because sharing your story doesn't exactly come natural to everyone. I generally find that helps a lot - if other people are anxious, at least you'll know you're not alone. Also, like I said before, with support groups people sort of come and go (as opposed to, say, a course, where everyone starts at the same time and joining later might make it hard to fit in) so you might not be the only new person there, and if you don't fit in directly, you'll get many fresh starts with new people if you decide to go again. as for people that leave - you can stay in touch with those you want to stay in touch with, and completely erase someone else out of your life if you didn't like them!

Also, if your fear about the group being filled with unaccepting cis people turns out to be true, there might be other options out there - for example, have you tried looking for trans specific groups?

 

Yeah cis people are not this bad And a lot of people are non-binary and just don't boast about it so...

 

heyy!!!meee i go to a leabian and bisexual group and i can totally relate to how scared you must feel but i can tell you that its the place now,after going for almost 2 years, where i feel more confortable. i was also feeling very lonely before i went and i cant be grateful enough to how much help im getting just from having people listen to me...with regards to your specific concerns:
1. there are new people alllll the time. you can imagine that a lot of people have busy schedules so cant come as often and then other people find out about the group and come for the first time just like you.
2. there are trans people. obviously because of stadistic there are fewer but it doesnt really matter. we share experiences and as lesbian/bi women (cis or not) we have more things that bring us together than those that separate us.

i can only send you all the strength i can to invite you to go and i wish you the best of luck make sure to keep us posted!!!