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Don't feel anything while cuddling

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Nelalvai, Oct 9, 2020.

  1. Nelalvai

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 11, 2019
    Messages:
    40
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    Location:
    Colorado, USA
    Gender:
    Genderqueer
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight but curious
    Out Status:
    A few people
    This woman and I have been getting to know each other the last few months. It's easy to talk to her and I like hanging out with her. we always hug goodbye, and tonight we cuddled up and watched a movie. Still pretty platonic, we're taking it slow and I like that.
    Every bit of physical contact we've had, I feel nothing. Not bad. Not good. I could be hugging a mixing bowl for all the emotions it doesn't trigger.
    It's like that with other people too. Like something in my brain switches off if someone touches me, and won't switch on till they stop. I don't understand it. I enjoyed cuddling with my ex... I've been missing physical affection since our breakup last year... Shouldn't I be excited to get that need filled at last? I want to be excited. I don't understand why it feels like this.
     
    #1 Nelalvai, Oct 9, 2020
    Last edited: Oct 9, 2020
  2. JennIsOn

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2020
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    10
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    2
    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Speaking from my own experience, I have a hard time opening up to any kind of vulnerability, which includes feeling awkward when I'm physically close to someone. Is it possible your previous breakup has you holding onto your heart a bit so you don't get hurt again?

    It sounds like taking it slow is working for you, though, and maybe more experiences with her will help you work through these feelings.