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does anyone identify as an afab transwoman?

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by gengen, Dec 8, 2015.

  1. gengen

    gengen Guest

    I am afab and I am a transwoman. Looking for others like me or simply to discuss (without hatred towards me)

    I'm not out to anyone except my partner, who is an amab transwoman.

    I am on hormones and considering surgery to reflect my true identity.
     
  2. FootballFan101

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    Im am just curious as to what that mean, does it mean you are ftmtf? Does it mean you are a woman who would prefer a male body?
     
  3. gengen

    gengen Guest

    It means I was assigned female at birth, and I identify as a trans female. I am considering bottom surgery but that doesn't mean I want a "male" body. Transwomen have women's bodies.
     
  4. WhereWeWere

    WhereWeWere Guest

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    Care to explain how that all works? If you were AFAB, why would you need bottom surgery? Why do you identify as a transwoman at all? Wouldn't that make you a cis female?

    I'm not saying this to be rude, or mean. I'm just genuinely curious.
     
  5. gengen

    gengen Guest

    Cis women don't have dysphoria. The bottom surgery is so I can have the anatomy of an un-altered transwoman.
     
  6. Eveline

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    Keep in mind that for many trans women, their core identity is that of a woman and they don't actually identify with the gender identity of trans woman as you see it. You have every right to identify as whatever you want but please be aware that the identity that you have adopted represents only a small amount of trans women who see being trans as a core part of their identity. The last thing most of us want is to have a body that is androgynous. Having a penis is something horrible to me and many others and associating being trans with having a penis can be mildly unsettling and can make us dysphoric.

    Outside of that, I hope you find peace in your identity of being a trans woman and that it helps you cope with whatever dysphoria that you feel.

    Hugs,

    (*hug*)

    Eveline
     
  7. gengen

    gengen Guest

    I am a member of the trans community already so I am *very* aware of all that you are saying. I don't associate being trans with having a penis, as you put it. Being trans is a whole lot more than anatomy, as I'm sure you would agree. I do realize that a lot of transwomen don't want to identify as trans, but I view that as part of being in a society so entrenched with cissexism and transmisogyny.
     
  8. GayPugs

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    I'm sorry but, what does afab mean? I'm not trans but I always love talking with anyone and I'm supportive of everybody.
     
  9. gengen

    gengen Guest

    Afab means "assigned female at birth"
     
  10. WhereWeWere

    WhereWeWere Guest

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    AFAB = Assigned Female at Birth
    it's also known as DFAB. Designated female at birth

    same goes for guys
    AMAB = assigned male at birth
    DMAB = designated male at birth
     
  11. GayPugs

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    Oh. Thanks.
     
  12. FootballFan101

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    But you're a guy and you are AFAB
     
  13. darkcomesoon

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    A trans woman isn't a woman with a dick. A trans woman is someone who was assigned male at birth but identifies as a woman. You are a dysphoric woman, but calling yourself a trans woman is appropriating an experience you do not have, and is misrepresenting what it means to be a trans woman. You are reducing an entire category of people to being women with penises. That is not what being a trans woman means.

    I assure your identity is entirely valid and I can also guarantee you are not the only person who was assigned female, needs a penis, but is still happy living socially as a woman. Still, the terminology you are using is inaccurate and frankly rude. I know that was not your intention, and I don't mean to come across as angry or hurtful, but dfab people by definition cannot be trans women. That is simply not what it means to be a trans woman. I would recommend considering whether the term "dysphoric female" would fit you. It describes a person with sex dysphoria who is happiest and most comfortable living socially as a woman.
     
  14. Eveline

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    Hmm... you yourself explained that you are trans because cisgender people don't feel dysphoria. The thing is, I don't relate with the experience of wanting to have a penis (Which is the source of your dysphoria according to your words.), so the one thing that connects us in context of being trans - gender dysphoria is also the biggest difference between us. If I was born in a female body I wouldn't be trans, I would be cisgender. I went through living hell because I was born in the wrong body. It's all about the body and the need to align my body with my innate gender which is simply female. With this in mind, anatomy is most definitely a major part of what it means to be trans for me.

    This has nothing to do with cissexism or transmisogyny, I am not ashamed of being trans (Which I am) or of who I am as a person but I do know that I am after all a woman and as such, I would like to have a body that reflects that and I want others to see me as nothing but a woman. Let me ask you something, are you ashamed of being female? Is identifying as cisgender something that you feel uncomfortable with? If yes, Why? What does the trans woman identity actually mean to you beyond the dysphoria that you feel?
     
    #14 Eveline, Dec 8, 2015
    Last edited: Dec 8, 2015
  15. gengen

    gengen Guest

    If you had read my responses you would see that I did state that being a transwoman was NOT all about anatomy, or a "penis" as you say. The fact that you would tell me that my identity is valid, but that I'm "doing it wrong" is rude and offensive. You are also misrepresenting yourself, as you obviously do not view my identity as valid. I am not "a woman with sex dysphoria" - THAT reduces me to a woman who just wants a penis, which I am not. I am exactly what I say I am, nothing more, nothing less.

    I also think it's funny that a man is currently telling a woman what she is or is not. I don't think any woman- trans, cis or whatever- would appreciate your mansplaining.

    ---------- Post added 8th Dec 2015 at 07:25 PM ----------

    Hmm... you yourself explained that you are trans because cisgender people don't feel dysphoria. The thing is, I don't relate with the experience of wanting to have a penis (Which is the source of your dysphoria according to your words.), so the one thing that connects us in context of being trans - gender dysphoria is also the biggest difference between us. If I was born in a female body I wouldn't be trans, I would be cisgender. I went through living hell because I was born in the wrong body. It's all about the body and the need to align my body with my innate gender which is simply female. With this in mind, anatomy is most definitely a major part of what it means to be trans for me.

    This has nothing to do with cissexism or transmisogyny, I am not ashamed of being trans (Which I am) or of who I am as a person but I do know that I am after all a woman and as such, I would like to have a body that reflects that and I want others to see me as nothing but a woman. Let me ask you something, are you ashamed of being female? Is identifying as cisgender something that you feel uncomfortable with? If yes, Why? What does the trans woman identity actually mean to you beyond the dysphoria that you feel?[/QUOTE]


    So for one, dysphoria is about so much more than genitalia, that was just ONE thing that I listed. I am not ashamed of anything, and of course I feel uncomfortable identifying as cis, the term doesn't fit me at all. I'm a trans woman, that means the same thing for me that it does to you: I would like to have a body that reflects what I want others to see me as, as a trans woman and nothing but a trans woman. I too went through hell living my life with the wrong body, with people viewing and treating me differently than I am. It's all about the need to align my body with my correct gender presentation, just like you. Yes, I acknowledge that you are a transwoman who is transitioning to be cis. I am a transwoman who is the most happy transitioning into a transwoman.
     
  16. WhereWeWere

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    Yes. I am quite aware of that haha.
     
  17. gengen

    gengen Guest

    So for one, dysphoria is about so much more than genitalia, that was just ONE thing that I listed. I am not ashamed of anything, and of course I feel uncomfortable identifying as cis, the term doesn't fit me at all. I'm a trans woman, that means the same thing for me that it does to you: I would like to have a body that reflects what I want others to see me as, as a trans woman and nothing but a trans woman. I too went through hell living my life with the wrong body, with people viewing and treating me differently than I am. It's all about the need to align my body with my correct gender presentation, just like you. Yes, I acknowledge that you are a transwoman who is transitioning to be cis. I am a transwoman who is the most happy transitioning into a transwoman.
     
  18. darkcomesoon

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    Okay, then what does it mean to be a trans woman to you then? If being a trans woman is not about anatomy, then how does it feel any different to be a trans woman than a cis woman? Trans women have been fighting for ages for people to recognize that their gender is not different than that of cis women; that "trans woman" and "cis woman" are not separate genders. They are all just women. One happens to have been dmab, one dfab.

    I am not just coming into this conversation with opinions I have formed entirely on my own and thrusting them upon you because I am a man. I have heard trans women say exactly what I am telling you about this topic. I have heard trans women talk about how offensive it is to suggest that there is an inherent difference in the genders of cis and trans women other than the sex they were assigned at birth. I have heard trans women objecting to exactly this phenomenon in which dfab people identify as trans women despite the fact that the direct definition of the word means a dmab person who identifies as female. I am recounting to you the opinions I have been told because those specific trans women are not here to tell you. I ask that you please not dismiss my valid arguments by calling them "mansplaining".
     
  19. Matto_Corvo

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    I also like to point out that no one is trying to invalidate your gender identity. I believe the questions asked are not mansplaining (also that is offensive so I kindly ask for you not to use that word again.). Everyone who has asked question, be the cis-trans-nb, are just trying to get a better understanding of your point of view.
     
  20. gengen

    gengen Guest




    Yes, cisgender women and transwomen are all "just women" as you say, just like white women and black women are both women, but are they the same? Do they have the same experience? Do they look the same? No, they are different. But they are all women.

    I'm sure you have heard trans women say a lot of things, but you did not present your information as being anything other than your own opinion before. Your sudden appeal to some un-named transwoman authority is transparently weak and back-tracking.

    The "direct definition" of the word transwoman is not a dmab person, it is a person who is transitioning to female, which I am. Or are transwomen not female? For that matter, are intersex women who identify as transwomen not female either?