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Do You Want Kids?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by canadawet, May 21, 2019.

?

Do you want/have children?

  1. Yes

    30.6%
  2. No

    45.9%
  3. Unsure

    23.5%
  1. canadawet

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    I'm curious about this because, just from what I've seen, people seem to want kids a lot less these days. I don't think that's a bad thing at all, but I want them one day, and sometimes I wonder if it'll be hard to find a lifelong partner because of it. This is by no means official, but I am interested in what the people of EC think!
     
  2. HM03

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    In addition to not wanting kids, I feel like lots of young adults just can't get financially on their feet enough to be able to afford it :/

    Certain parts of parenthood seem nice, but for the most part I'm "no" vote
     
    #2 HM03, May 21, 2019
    Last edited: May 21, 2019
  3. BMC77

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    No real interest in having children. A good thing since the last thing we need is a bunch of BMC77s running about who are just like Daddy! LOL

    More seriously...I can remember expressing zero interest even in high school. I've had the moments of "maybe"...but they pass quickly. A good thing, since if I'd been interested, it would most likely have resulted in a straight marriage, which would possibly be imploding right about now. I also have some pessimism for the future of the world (one big issue of concern: the possibility that climate change won't be addressed, and this planet won't be livable in a 100 years), and I'm glad I don't have a children who might be affected.
     
  4. BMC77

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    It will certainly be a limiting factor, although I'm not sure it will make it "hard" finding someone.

    In my own situation, I don't think I'd be interested in a relationship with someone who wants children. That said...I wouldn't rule the possibility out completely. If someone comes along who is otherwise 100% ideal, well, I might be willing to negotiate.
     
  5. BothWaysSecret

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    I've always wanted kids. I'd like to have two or three. Just gotta find someone to marry first...
     
  6. Mirko

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    I'm undecided at the moment. A part of me wouldn't mind adopting a child - I think it would be pretty neat even though it can be tough. On the other hand, the costs in doing so is something that has kept me thinking about it and trying to figure out how it could potentially work out.
     
  7. OGS

    OGS
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    When I was younger I thought I did, but I think a lot of it was just wanting to meet societal expectations. I thought my husband was very wise when this topic came up early in our relationship. He basically said I think you would be a wonderful father, but I think it's an idea that we need to live with for a while. He asked if we could table the decision for two years. We did, and I basically got over the desire to have children. I asked him later if that's what he thought would happen and he admitted that that's exactly what he thought would happen...
     
  8. Andrew99

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    Oh god no!
     
  9. SemiCharmedLife

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    1000% no. I love being a dog dad, and it's further solidified that I'm not suited to be a human dad.
     
  10. Shorthaul

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    They do need all the love and care a child needs, but won't wreck the car or need a college fund.

    I'm cool without having kids and just being an Uncle. All the fun but at the end of the day I can send them home with their parents lol.
     
  11. terechang

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    I
    I dont want kids AND i am sure of that . I have discuss with my partner the topic AND we are sure we dont want kids .

    Many lesbian women have social/family presure to have kids
     
  12. Love4Ever

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    My girlfriend and I want to adopt in the future. We both have discussed this and we both feel this is what we want to do. <3 I have always been a proponent of adoption and for years have always said that I wanted to do that over having biological children. My girlfriend briefly considered something like a sperm donor as a possible option but in the end we both have decided that for now at least we don’t feel the need to have a pregnancy to be parents and are happy with giving a loving home to a child who needs one.
     
  13. Lena2051

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    I'm glad you guys decided on adoption, being orphaned sucks, I was. :baby:
     
  14. Devil Dave

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    No. I love being an uncle, but I'm not dad material.

    As an uncle, I get to be a big kid again. I can watch cartoons and play board games and lego with my nieces and nephews. And I can spoil them by buying them treats because I don't have kids of my own. As a dad I would have to do all the serious stuff. Changing their nappies, pay for their school uniforms, look after them when they're sick, tell them off when they don't do as their told, get depressed about having too much responsibility. Fuck that shit.
     
  15. Ruby Dragon

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    I've thought about what it'd be like to have kids of my own, then I spend a couple of minutes in the company of kids and I'm "cured". It's a massive responsibility, and having to manage my own life and that of another person, who is completely dependent on me, seems like a train smash waiting to happen. I barely have a handle on my own life at the moment, so it's a definite no from me.

    Then, as a more "official" response: I'm bipolar. It's hereditary, I do not want my future child/ren to suffer the way I have/am still suffering. It's not a walk in the park and not as glamorous as it sounds. Trust me. So there's that to think about too. Even if I did want to have children, it'd be to please my partner instead of me actually wanting a child. And I've seen what pregnancy does to a woman's body - and in some cases, mind too - and I want no part of that. Not to mention the birthing process. NO THANKS!

    I've considered donating my eggs but that'll still be a problem, because of my bipolar disorder and the fact that it's hereditary. I got it from my dad, though he's undiagnosed, but he does have depression, and he got it from his dad. His late brother had it too, so I know it runs in the family for sure, at least from my dad's side. So if I do ever decide to have kids (doubtful), I will probably adopt rather than "make my own". Some women say that there's no better feeling than knowing there's a human growing inside of you, but with everything that can go wrong, and again, the birthing process, I'm put off. And I get annoyed/irritable easily, and with kids being so persistent and repetitive with noises, "games", etc. it's a ticking time bomb for sure. I once babysat my now nearly 9-year old niece, and I had the strong urge to smash her head into the wall everytime she cried. So I know that it'd be dangerous for me to have children, because I do not trust myself enough. Nothing bad happened during that time, fortunately, but the urge was there, and that alone scared me senseless.

    TL;DR: No, I do not want kids.
     
  16. Unsure77

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    I enjoy my friends' children, but I also enjoy the fact that they go home at the end of the night when they come over.
     
  17. Push

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    I say no. But yes to a dog
     
  18. jenne

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    hell no.. i don't see a reason to have kids
    i'm too selfish
    i want it all for myself
    haha
     
  19. BlueMonday

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    A big fat no.
     
  20. Destin

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    Yes. It would have to be a minimum of two though, so they would always have each other to play with and rely on as they grow up, like an automatic best friend so they wouldn't feel lonely.

    I wouldn't seriously consider it until I was at least 30 though, having kids before that just seems way too soon. I mean, I'm 22 and can barely take care of myself, I can't even imagine being married and having a kid already at 18.