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Do you prefer femme/butch/androgynous women?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Foxfeather, Mar 17, 2016.

  1. Foxfeather

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    Just out of curiosity. I'm fairly androgynous myself but I've been wondering if I should femme it up a bit to gain more female attention. I know that there's a stereotype of an entire butch-femme dynamic, but I don't know, all I ever see are femme-femme couples and butch-butch or androgynous-androgynous couples . . .

    I'm also a bit insecure because I'm running on the small size. I'm petite and more often called "cute" than "hot"--and the only women who've called me beautiful were all straight friends , oddly...

    But despite how cute I look on the outside, I've got quite an an appetite and I know I'll be better on top and pleasing my partner. I'd much rather have someone who's tomboyish/stronger on the streets (so we can look out for each other) but femme in the sheets--if you don't mind me using such terms.
     
    #1 Foxfeather, Mar 17, 2016
    Last edited: Mar 17, 2016
  2. Invidia

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    Hmm... I like androgyny a lot regardless of sex. Otherwise femme girls can be cute too.
     
  3. ShadowGirl

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    Femme girls
     
  4. SHACH

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    This is something I worry about. Since I realise I really liked girls, I felt free to be my true tomboy self. However, recently, I've been seeing a rise in femme-femme couples in the public eye, and they are very cute together and publicly adored. This makes me feel unsure about going too far with my tomboy tendencies. Like, I was seriously wanting to get a really short boycut but now I'm definitely having second thoughts.

    In terms of what I like... I don't want someone completely girly, I just feel like I have nothing in common with those sort of girls. I have to say I prefer them more on the femmer side with a tomboyish edge or like power woman spirit. Androgynous girls can be really entrancing and I always admire them but they're not always as intrinsicly sexy as femmier girls, though they look super confident just by virtue of their edgeyness, whether they really are or not, and that's pretty sexy. I would probably date an androgynous girl if I liked her. I have not come across many. Really butch girls... I would probably not date them. I'm not into that look.
     
  5. marcelinevin

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    I like all kinds of girls on anywhere on the butch and femme scales and out of it. For me it's more about the presence a person has and there's more than one specific way for women to be hot or beautiful. I tend to prefer girls who have a softness to them mixed with the opposite in some way and have medium to long hair, but even then I'm thinking "no, but I also like girls like __". Androgynous girls are just as beautiful than everyone else is. I've never really experienced only being attracted to something specific in girls before, and feel like it would be a really limiting way to think. Like for me personality is a huge, huge chunk of being attractive.

    I do relate, though. Sometimes I think about how I should try and look different ways so that girls would like me. (Like, basically how I felt about everything growing up in terms of fitting into a type of scene/look/etc.) But then I figure that I should just present myself in the way that is most myself and makes me the most comfortable. If someone only wants me or gets an interest in me because I am butch or femme etc then they don't want me because I'm not that, they want an idea or something they've pictured in their head before they met me. So I don't really feel like trying to fit into something like that. That said, I probably wont find someone easily this way lol. Just my thoughts about myself, not anyone else.
     
  6. Natasha Elyssa

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    I personally prefer femme girls.
     
  7. Aerin

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    Personality is really big for me too, I've never really sustained attraction for someone based on looks alone for very long.

    Based on appearances though, I'm almost exclusively physically attracted to butch women. When I first started questioning, it really concerned me that I was so specific about only liking butch girls, but I've reached the point where I think it's okay to like what I like. There's just something really attractive to me about a woman that presents this way.

    I do of course appreciate femme girls, but I generally look at them in a comparison way, like I'll notice a femme girl's hair or clothing and think "that's cute, I should do that". But if I really like a femme girl's personality, I'm able to develop feelings for her too.

    But speaking of physical attraction, yeah, I'd definitely say butch women.
     
  8. geeki

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    When looking at girls, I always seem to find myself "checking out" slightly more masculine/butch girls. Just in general, femininity sort of throws me and I can't relate to it. :slight_smile:
     
  9. gravechild

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    Androgynous or masculine. I can appreciate good looks on a feminine woman, but they sort of bore me, emotionally. They don't have that energy that sucks me in the same way as the before mentioned types do.

    Perhaps it's because I'm submissive and feminine, myself?
     
  10. YeahpIdk

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    Androgynous femme :newcolor:
     
  11. Systems

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    Well, being androgynous you're increasing your odds of getting female attention from women who like androgynous women. And if you prefer to be androgynous, wouldn't that be a pretty big advantage? I mean, if you don't like looking/acting femme, it could get old having to look/act like that. Plus I'm not sure if femme women get more attention in the first place.

    Personally, I'm most often attracted to femme women, but it's not uncommon for me to be attracted to androgynous women, and I've been attracted to butch women before. Basically my preference is for very feminine women, whether they also have prominent masculinity or not. Usually not, but I think that's just a matter of femme women being more common than androgynous women.
     
  12. Creativemind

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    Androgynous. I'm not really attracted to stereotypical femininity at all because I feel that they put too much time making their appearance look fake and plastic, which is a turn-off. I could never watch porn because the women turn me off with the barbie doll look. So if I dated a femme it would have to be a soft femme.
     
  13. Browncoat

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    I prefer nerds. And badasses. Or better yet nerdy badasses.

    Their appearance means little to me. Though I guess you could say I prefer long hair (on men, too, before someone accuses me of sexism...).
     
  14. SHACH

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    Omg yes the barbie doll look really turns me off and ruins so much porn for me haha. I really do not see the appeal. I don't even understand why men love it so much...
     
  15. MayaBee

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    A mix out of all of them. But in the end, confidence is key.
     
  16. devotions

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    Femme/"chapstick" mostly with some rare exceptions.

    This is kind of random, but does anyone else find it difficult to find people that a) fit your preferences physically and personality wise b) have similar interests and c) that like you? I mean I can't even imagine actually finding someone bc of this and it sort of bugs me, was wondering if it's a common thing.

    Like one time there was this feminine girl that hit on me-so I should like her, right?- but I just didn't connect at all with her on any level, although I could see that she was pretty I just didn't feel anything. My brain is such an asshole bc it just gets stuck on this straight girl rather than on someone I'd actually have a chance with >.> I guess attraction is just weird like that. We all want what we can't get.
     
  17. blueshadedsoul

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    Masculine or androgynous.

    & yes lmao very much that ._.
     
  18. KarenLyn

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    My gf is femme and I guess I prefer femme girls but she's like I am... we're from Arizona where the girls can go from pretty in pink to combat boots, flannel shirts and a ball cap in 2.4 seconds and it's not being butch or anything... that's just the southwest desert kinda girl
     
  19. Lipstick Leuger

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    Butch. I prefer a well dressed Dapper type of Butch, not a "can't wear my pants at my waist and have to show my boxers" type. More KD Lang than Shane from the L word. I don't consider her a Butch anyhow, I consider her soft butch at best and that is giving her leeway........I have dated all types of Butches, and a few Femmes, but there simply is no spark between Femmes and myself. Give me a strong Masculine of Center woman, and my heart just flutters.
     
  20. YuriBunny

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    I love cuteness, and I think that girly girls are super cute~. ♥