Hi all- I'm a 60-year old bi male, thought I would wind up in the closet someday but didn't realize I've actually been there my whole life. Does that make sense? I've had a very weird life, lots of mental health issues. I'm an artist and writer, too. Have no idea where I'm at right now. Turning 60 really changed my emotional makeup for some reason, and one thing I feel I need to do, for some reason, is to be honest about my attraction and love for my own gender. I've always been bi, but kept same-sex thoughts in a little lock box that I could only open in the utmost safety and privacy. Now at 60 I realize not only I've been foolish about it but I've been fucked up about women, sex and fulfilling relationships right from the start. Well, anyway, I'm glad to be here, and this is my first step out of the closet. I'm hoping for some positive change in myself. Right now I feel like I've never even understood love.
Heavysigh.....Hello and a great big LGBTQIA+ welcome to Empty Closets! I can remember the first post that I made on EC. I was desperate for help and I got the help that night that I so needed. I hope that we can help you in the same way that I received help. The most important thing to remember about Empty Closets is that we do care about you! We're very glad that you found us here on EC and hope that we can answer questions, give you support and provide a place to vent (as long as it's not violent!) when that becomes necessary! *****There are 18 different sub-forums here that you can check out and join in the conversations or start your own thread/conversation. When I first joined Empty Closets I was in need of a lot of support and encouragement and I found it here…EC is a safe place. I hope that you'll find good things here too! Folks here will talk to you and share...you don't have to be afraid of asking questions...we're glad to have you! Empty Closets is all about making connections and giving LGBT folks a voice when they otherwise don't have one in their day-to-day lives. In particular you may want to check out the forums that are titled "Sexual Orientation” and "LGBT Later in Life", there are people there who may have dealt with some of the same kind of issues that could be challenging you. There are a lot of us here on EC who have hidden from society and ourselves for years. Like you many of us have finally come to accept who we really are as we have grown older. I came out here on Empty Closets when I was 64 in 2014. It was a very good choice and was the only way that I was finally able to be free of the depression and self-hate that had been a part of my life for so long. We are very glad that you have found us! Remember that you are a part of our LGBTQ Family and we do care! Some info on how to navigate EC: When you have made at least 10 posts on various threads you will be able to post messages on a member's Profile Page. Just click on a member's Avatar Picture and then click on "Profile Page" in the dialogue box that pops up. You'll then be on their Profile Page and there will be a box that says: "Write Something" When you have been on EC for a few weeks and have made at least 50 posts on various forums, you can apply for Full Membership. A Full Member can send Private Messages (PM) to other Full Members and share personal contact info. Right now you can only send a PM to a Staff Member as that is always possible. Here is a quote from the Full Membership information forum: *****To be eligible you must be a member of Empty Closets for a minimum of two weeks, and have a minimum of 50 posts. These posts must be across numerous forums (Fun & Games does not contribute to post count), and consistently posted across a minimum of two weeks. You wouldn't be eligible, for example, if you registered, had no activity for two weeks, and then returned to post 50 times on your 14th day of membership. *****Well, as I said, we're very glad you found us! If you have any questions at all, you can always send me a Private Message. .....David
I'm glad you are here, welcome! It almost seems like most people are messed up regarding relationships of all types so you are not alone. Most people have bad examples and methods to learn from, like always using shame to change human behavior which ruins us. I hope you get to do whatever you want that's safe and consensual and it's better than you thought it could be!
Hi! Welcome to EC. Yes it al makes sense. Your story is so familiar. You are definitely in the right place. I had my reckoning at 74 after brain surgery. I mean that’s what it took for me to realize I couldn’t live in a phony secret world (closet) anymore. I told my wife a few months ago and she freaked out. We’re still together but our marriage was damaged anyway (that’s another story). Haven’t told kids I’m Bi yet, but that will happen. You mentioned you have had mental health issues. My issue was alcohol and drugs. Been clean and sober for over 38 years now. That created more problems than I have time for. Whew understanding love is something I believe I’ll have to work on in my next life. What important for me right now is being who I am and being okay with that. EC has helped me get on the right path and stay there. Couldn’t have asked for more. You’ll find the same support here.
Hope you find what the right one for you. Let's get to know each other? I really like what you have put it's nice to see and for an older man it's definitely nice to hear x
Hello and welcome to the EC! It's never too late to start living as your true self. I hope you get the support you need.
One thing I have to say is realising I was gay was literally liberating. I am into feminine men, not men in general, which is why it took me longer to realise my sexuality. According to the Kinsey test I am 100% gay and I am totally comfortable with it.
