Am I missing something? About 2.5 years ago, for the first time ever, I realized my romantic attraction to her. So here I am now, still strong feelings, and by now, pretty comfortable with who I am but suffering.. We are talking, and she helps me out, which I absolutely love. Its been a slow process since my unsuccessful confession a while back which damaged our communication big time. The whole recovery process has been painful. I actually don't know for sure how to label myself. But, what I don't have a need for is to 'come out'. It's not in my plans for some reason.. Maybe this need is muted by this huge secret I carry every day - my feelings for her. Or maybe it is muted by my hetero marriage, responsibility for kids, and husband. I told my husband couple years ago about being attracted to her and it went terrible. I can't say I am 'in the closet'. Instead it is more of being 'secretly in love'. Have any of you felt similar? Or, has Coming Out been your ultimate thing to do?