Hey everyone. So I'm heading off to school in less than a month now. I've been talking to this girl that I'm going to school with online after meeting her earlier this summer, and I have a crush on her. With the way that things are going, and if this keeps up once we get on campus, I think that we might end up dating (which fills me with so much hope and excitement you can't even imagine!) ... but there's a problem. I'm not out to my parents yet. The only member of my family that I've told is my younger brother, and he was super chill with it. My main concern is that if the stars align and she's my girlfriend, I don't want to come home with her and surprise them. But I'm also not sure if I'm ready to come out yet. Is it alright to potentially date someone for a short while and not come out to my parents until I'm more comfortable, or should I be out before making that commitment? thanks y'all
Coming out is a personal decision. Some come out then date, others date then come out, others come out by bringing their bf/gf home. Since it sounds like you're not ready to come out then it might be better to date and see how it goes then come out the next time you go home if you're ready.
It really depends on how patient your (potential) gf is. I still had a bit of coming out to do when I started dating my bf. It probably took me 3 months in to come out to my dad, another couple of months until my bf and dad met, and a total of like 7 months in until my bf came over to my house. My bf has the patience of a saint lol. Don't let anybody force you to come out, but also keep in mind that it requires a bit of patience on her part, but waiting a few months into your potential relationship shouldn't be that big of a deal. I would have never come out to my family if I wasn't in a relationship. Even though he was patient, I still felt super bad that I'd go over to his house all the time but not vice versa.
