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Come out to Girlfriend

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by Atom95, Apr 29, 2020.

  1. Atom95

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 23, 2020
    Messages:
    14
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    Location:
    England
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    Hey Guys,

    So i am not the best writer and today has only been the first day but here is my story so far.

    Yesturday me and my ex-girlfriend (yes ex) went for a walk and have a cigarette, during this time we started chatting as she was talking about moving, anyway one thing lead to another and i ended up telling her that i am gay. I was so nervous and shaking like a leaf she did not really understand at first because we had been physically involved. I just explain to her about thr emotional connection that i was attracted to and when we first got together there was physical attraction. She was happy for me. Just upset about losing the relationship.

    That is fair enough, anyway today has been a tough one painful but also a small part of me is happy which then gets overshadowed but guilt. So we are both very depressed at the moment.

    I dont really see any future at the moment i have no clue what to do. Will she be okay? Does anyone have any advice?
     
  2. TheodoreAC

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 30, 2019
    Messages:
    78
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    10
    Location:
    Southern California
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Questioning
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I can't speak for your ex obviously, but break-ups are all hard and she probably has a friend who's shoulder she can lean on.
    As for advice, I am going to assume since you did not specify what kind, that you are talking about coming out.

    Coming out is hard for everyone no matter how supportive you know someone will be, or if you know how they are going to react, it's always hard.
    Just coming out to one person irl, other than your ex, can be really beneficial for your mental health. A good start can be a sibling you're close to if you trust them, or a long time friend is another good one.

    You can come out by writing a letter explaining this part of yourself, or over a call because being in person can be dangerous if you don't know how the other person is going to react. You can also come out in person, that's better suited to when you think the other person will be supportive and understanding.

    That's all the advice I've got with much other context but I hope it helps you.
     
  3. LostInDaydreams

    Moderator Full Member

    Joined:
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    Messages:
    4,300
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    Location:
    UK
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    That’s a big step, so well done. :slight_smile:

    She’ll be OK. It’s a lot to process. She’s probably reviewing and questioning the whole relationship. Give her time and if you feel able to, be there to answer any questions that she has.

    I hope the last few days have been ok. You’re living together in lockdown, yes?