So, I only see my family every couple weeks or so and when I do, getting a chance to talk 1:1 can be difficult. When you have made it to your 30's without coming out, how important do you think it is to come out in person versus on the phone?
I honestly don't think it's a big deal as long as it isn't a big deal to you. It may be easier to come out on the phone because you don't have to see they're reaction. A lot of my personal fear of coming out is about seeing the look in the person's eyes. I think it could be more powerful in person but really it's up to you and how you feel comfortable. Good luck, however you choose to do this.
Fuzzy.....A lot depends on how your family communicates. If phone calls are pretty common between family members then that could very well work out. There is another way to avoid the face-to-face scenario and that is to use a letter. The letter could be mailed or turned into an email. The big advantage of a letter is not being present when it is read. Sometimes the person who you are coming out to needs time to process what you are telling them. Usually, we have known for years that we are LGBTQ+ and have finally worked through all of the emotions to the point of coming out. However, the person you are coming out to (in person) doesn't get time to think though what you've just told them. A letter gives them that time. Empty Closets has some good sample letters that you could check out. Here is the link: http://emptyclosets.com/home/pages/resources/coming-out-letters.php. I hope this helps! Remember that you are a part of our LGBTQ+ Family and we do care! Please keep us updated on how this all works out. .....David
I came out via text at 40... I think it’s all in what you use to communicate with folks on a regular basis. But if you want to do in person then do that. It’s all up to you.
I'd say whatever feels right within the context of the relationship you have with that person. So far I've just come out to friends and almost all of them I've done face to face. The only two I've emailed were friends who live in other countries so meeting them in person wasn't an option. Also, in each case I've precis-ed my announcement by saying or texting 'I've got something big to tell you about me..'. It mentally prepares the person you're telling so the shock to them isn't so great.
Hi. I’d have to agree with Chicodeoro and it would depend on the relationship you have with that particular person. Please don’t take any advice I have to give as an expert opinion though. I’ve only done it twice, both face to face and with a great outcome. It gives you a massive high to say the words and realise that the person you’re telling only cares about you and not ‘what you are’. Good luck. Frankie x Ps I am in my 40’s and hating myself for wasting life so crack on ☺️
As has been said, it depends on your relationship with your individual family members, I think. If you know you have family members who are very loving, open, and overall positive, in-person would probably be a good way to show them how much you trust in them and their support. If there's any question in your mind as to whether they will take it well, become flustered, or take it badly, the phone call or letter route might be good options--the latter especially in cases of anyone you feel might not be as accepting (be it when the info is first presented to them or ever).
