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Came out to my dad...

Discussion in 'Coming Out Stories' started by ABeautifulMind, Oct 25, 2016.

  1. ABeautifulMind

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    For starters, I have not mentioned that I am demi to my dad yet, but honestly that is not a major hurdle, and I was so relieved after coming out as bi I completely forgot to mention the demisexuality til after I had already left the conversation... For me the bisexuality was really the difficult issue... Some have read my threads regarding my letters, well I will probably just let my dad read my moms and give me pointers on it, in the process reading about the demi part of my identity... I explained it pretty well in there IDK, i am not worried about that right now... But now for the story:

    I called my dad in my room, watched the talking dead episode we had missed last night, and told him I am bisexual...

    In that order

    I started out by asking him if he was capable of keeping a secret, and more specifically could he continue responding to my mom in the context that he didnt know a secret and not let it accidentally slip... He said well I have kept some of your sisters secrets from your mom, I am sure I can keep yours... After that, It went well, as I knew it would. So then I just told him, I am bisexual.. He said ok... I told him there were a few reasons I never said anything... First I told him I knew when he was younger he wasnt cool with it but for at least the last decade he has been fine with it and he agreed completely... Back when he was in the navy is when he wasnt cool with it which is understandable given his parents and environment... And that I had wanted to say something for a long time but wasnt sure he could keep it from my mom... But that I knew he was kool with it now... I told him about the 2 points I made in my moms letter... about when she was kinda really homophobic... Then he said to be honest him and my mom had discussed my orientation in the past and he basically didnt care what orientation I was.. And he didnt think she did either... I told him I really doubt that... Then I reconfirmed that this was something he would continue to act oblivious to...

    That was about it... Then I left the conversation to do my work out...

    I still have to explain the demi stuff, but lets be honest, not wanting to fuck just anyone, but rather only people you have a strong connection to, is sort of every parents wet dream... Im not worried about telling him that now that I got the bisexual bit out of the way... The only reason I am so concerned with it with my mom is because I feel like I have to defend my sexuality with her lol... and demisexuality helps explain me just a little bit more...

    Anyways, that is the story thus far, but the good news is I am also now going to come out to my niece, most likely tomorrow... She told me the other night through a weird turn of events that she didnt have a problem with boys dating boys lol, so now I feel like telling her would give me a major ally with my mom... So I suppose wish me luck on that, though I dont think it will be dramatic in the slightest... She is young, youngsters are revolutionizing acceptance :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

    So... I wasnt sure how I would feel after but considering I just finished my workout and got to clear my head... Where I thought I was ending the journey, the more I think about it, the more it feels like the journey might be the destination... Ok so maybe I am still experiencing a runners high lol..

    Bottom line is I feel like a sense of relief... I honestly for the longest time had reserved myself to ignore the same sex attraction, never come out, and force myself to find a heteronormal relationship... It is so nice to finally be able to be honest about this.. regardless of whether I end up in a same sex or opposite sex relationship.. Well, with my dad.. for now... More to come...

    If only I felt as good about Walking Dead :tears: :tears: :tears:
     
  2. Quantumreality

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    WOOHOO, ABeautifulMind! Congratulations!:thumbsup: I'm so happy for you!

    I think watching the Walking Dead, then Coming Out is a pretty unique scenario, but it worked!:grin:
     
  3. ABeautifulMind

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    I could have never come out after that episode of walking dead :tears: :tears: :tears:

    It was a heartbreaking episode...

    It was talking dead a talk show about the walking dead lol, but I know that isnt really the point... It was essentially just something to stall and keep him in my room... Until I worked up the courage to come out...

    Still cant believe I actually did it :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

    Really glad I did though... BTW I totally did it off the cuff... Meaning I didnt even have the paper/outline with me...
     
  4. Totesgaybrah

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    Congratulations! sounds like it went well, your dad sounds pretty chill. Its so great to see all these new coming out stories and they are all going well.
     
  5. Guff

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    That episode of TWD was pretty intense.. LOL

    I'm so happy it all worked out with your dad!
    I'm very hopeful that he keeps your privacy and your mom is just as accepting when you cross that road
     
  6. ABeautifulMind

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    I know... I am so sorry to see Glen go.... But I loved how they used religious symbolism to invoke God imagery from Negan... That Carl scene was a total steal from the bible and the God/Isaiah story...

    Luckily I doubt it will be a very long time before I come out to my mom.... I cant imagine it being more than a month... I really doubt it will be that long... IDK...

    Depends on what my dad says when I let him read that letter to my mom and get his advice on it...
     
  7. Guff

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    I know you aren't religious, but I pray that things go well with you and your mom.
    I really care about you and it's hard to read your struggles
    I just want you to have a break, you've just been through so much
     
  8. faustian1

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    At least you didn't do it after the presidential debate... :lol:

    And no script, too. I'm jealous.
     
  9. ABeautifulMind

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    Yea, the script being gone meant I did forget some things lol...

    I completely forgot to bring up being demi, because I was so fixated on coming out as bi....

    But I thought if my dad saw the script he would see I put some preparation and planning into it and might think it is because I was nervous about telling him.. Make no mistake, I was, but it was not because of anything he did... I basically didnt want him to feel like he did something wrong that made me afraid to tell him... IDK if that is normal or weird but that is how I felt...

    I didnt even watch that debate... I am genuinely tired of the election, which sucks because it is such an important one... John Oliver has it right with the "I dont even believe in reincarnation but I must have done something seriously fucked up in a past life to deserve this, Im sorry Im sorry Im sorry" 2016 lol...