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Bottoming

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by AlecF, Apr 20, 2017.

  1. AlecF

    AlecF Guest

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    Is bottoming seen as more "feminine" in the sex dynamic. I've never had sex before so I really don't know. But one of my teamates is down to go out on a date around town tommorow night and if things go well from there,well ya know... I'm gonna fuck him if he lets me fuck him
     
  2. I'm gay

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    This is so often misunderstood both in the gay and straight communities.

    Masculinity/femininity have absolutely nothing to do with preferred position in anal sex. It is a terrible myth that gets stereotyped that bottoms are femmes and tops are masc dudes. It's just simply not true and never was. Don't buy into the stereotypes. I have met and been with all types of guys who prefer all positions and fetishes. They simply don't relate.

    Good luck, and wear a condom! :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:ride:
     
  3. Chiroptera

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    Nailed it. :slight_smile:

    And, food for thought: Even if bottoming was more "feminine"...why would that be a problem, anyway?

    But, yes, don't buy into the stereotypes.

    As long as everyone involved in the sexual action are consenting adults using protection, there is no problem with it, regardless of positions.
     
  4. Quantumreality

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    Hey AlecF,

    To go along with what I'm gay and Chiroptera said, I would add that you should only do what is comfortable with you. Some guys find more pleasure in bottoming. Some guys find more pleasure in topping. Some guys don't even like anal sex at all.

    Don't compromise yourself to please your current partner/date. Do only what you are comfortable doing.

    Isn't the point of sex - other than heterosexual reproduction -simply about mutual pleasure? If you or your partner don't mutually enjoy it, what's the point?

    My 2cents.
     
  5. AlecF

    AlecF Guest

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    What about HIV? Do I ask that question? Is that off putting?
     
  6. OnTheHighway

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    It is common practice and widely accepted to ask a potential sex partner if they have been recently tested and what their status is for STI's and HIV. It is firmly embedded in LGBT culture. You should feel very comfortable asking, and your potential partner should be comfortable responding honestly. Just the same, as part of that question when asked, it is also the right time to talk about practicing safe sex and using a condom.

    This discussion happens all the time all over the world.
     
  7. I'm gay

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    I don't know if people your age are engaging in those honest conversations about STIs and HIV status. OTH is correct that it is firmly embedded in LGBT culture that those questions and conversations are normal and even expected. I have had those conversations with EVERY guy I have been with, and no one seemed in any way put off by it. It's treated as very normal and expected.

    I would suggest that whether or not people your age are doing this, you can insist, and should insist, on those talks before having sex with someone. Anyone not willing to discuss it should be a red flag for you - not that they necessarily have HIV, but it points to their ignorance - and you don't want to be engaging in sex with someone who lacks proper knowledge of safer sex practices.

    Take care. :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:ride:
     
  8. grass

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    Get tested whenever you can and use plenty of lube and a condom
     
  9. vin21chub

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    Hey man, thanks for the question. I've had the same problem. I feel comfortable bottoming than top. But, sometimes this leads me to question my gender identity. The guys also I have spoken to sometimes made me feel like I'm more feminine than normal. But I also like being top once in a while kinda confuses me tad bit.
     
  10. marceloween

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    I am a top, but I am not masculine, I act very gay and I am proud of it. Also I don't give a f when people think I am a bottom.
     
  11. birobigenausex

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    The male g spot is in the bum, so not as feminine as some may think...
     
  12. Chiroptera

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    To be more accurate, it isn't about a "g spot": The anus is an erogenous zone (which means it is a zone that can generate/feel sexual pleasure when stimulated).

    That is true for both men and women, including heterosexual men (althought, because of prejudice, straight men seldom mention this as a form of pleasure).

    Not everyone feels the same amount of pleasure in the same areas, so some men/women don't enjoy anal activities, some do, regardless of orientation. But, yes, it is one of the erogenous zones on the body, and many people enjoy sexual activities that involve that zone.
     
  13. birobigenausex

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    Yeah, but it's not an erogenous zone exclusive to females. So how can it be considered feminine when it's unisex? :icon_bigg That's what I meant.
     
  14. Chiroptera

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    Yup, that's correct. :slight_smile:
     
  15. GoinStag

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    Yeah I agree with the 2nd guy it's not more "femme" or whatever. I've been with guys who are masc bottoms and a couple who weren't so much. I mean it can go either way, really. Such a diverse group of people.
     
  16. James23367

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    Just be romantic and see how it plays out, always have to see what your partner is comfortable with. What the two of you enjoy is not defined by masc or fem but by what you enjoy as a couple.
     
    #16 James23367, Apr 23, 2017
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 23, 2017
  17. SiennaFire

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    Bottoming can be seen as more submissive though that's a stereotype as others have posted. Some bottoms are in fact more dominant as power bottoms. Personally I think that flip flopping is hot and side steps the whole dominant/submissive masculine/feminine question (!)
    ---------- Post added 23rd Apr 2017 at 08:30 AM ----------
    just to be clear men have the additional pleasure of prostate stimulation, which is what birobigenausex is probably referring to as the male g spot
     
    #17 SiennaFire, Apr 23, 2017
    Last edited: Apr 23, 2017