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being aproachable

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Gamer Guy, Sep 3, 2024.

  1. Gamer Guy

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    so i read tons of stuff here and u all gave great ideas so i decided to try to go to football game to just be like social and if this isnt terrifying and it goes ok how do i kinda like make myself aproachable or no who else is gay or looking or interested? since it other school its all new people and they cant judge me or no ne thing about me so it like starting new
    this is completely outside of ne thing id do but its also exciting but scary and i feel like i have to make myself do it i do have a female freind that would go so im not alone
     
  2. tallslenderguy

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    i don't know what area of Pennsylvania you live in, so i did a state wide search using: gay organizations for teens in pennsylvania and it turned up several organizations. i'll put a link at the bottom, it has a map of organizations all over Pennsylvania, so maybe you will be able to find one near where you live. Also, sometimes there are gay clubs or groups in some high schools. i think just learning to be friendly and approachable is a great idea, but would suggest being careful about who you come out too. The organizations i found in the search may be a safe place for you to meet other people your age who are also LGBTQ+.
    https://payouthcongress.org/directory/
     
  3. Gamer Guy

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    yea im like in middle of nowhere closest thing on that site it said is 30 miles away even the largest city near me bloomsburg has nothing living in mountains sucks and my school def has nothing but thanx for trying
     
  4. Gamer Guy

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    the closet one is something called pflag.org and it looks like more for adults it talks about suporting children and grandchild ren
    i dunno if that is a teen freindly one
     
  5. Roaming Soul

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    I’ve read this post a couple times during the day and while good for you for wanting to put yourself out there, you won’t be able to just know what someone’s sexual preference is and you don’t want to outright share yours with everyone in a new place. You’ll be extremely vulnerable and you definitely don’t want that. You just have to go enjoy the game, walk around the bleachers or whatever type of stands you have or concession stands and meet people your age. Having a friend is a very smart idea. Safety is highest priority. Focus on just going and socializing for now. You may have to go a few times to start understating people’s body language or signs they may give. You should be in no hurry to just find anyone. This is just my opinion and take what you can from it but remember safety is key. Good luck.
     
  6. Gamer Guy

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    i get what u sayin and i prob will be very nervous and quiet but i wanna see if i can do it thanx
     
  7. BoatyD

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    Think u be ok if like football. I not go alone but that just me. Loads 1s at my school reckon they guess who gay but never guess I am so just dont think can tell.
     
  8. tallslenderguy

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    i think your plan and what you are doing is great. Part of being in the closet can mean hiding other parts of your self as well, just hiding in general. i think it's a great idea to get out there and live, be social and i think it's also great to have a friend along. Actually, if people see you there with a girl, they may assume she's a girlfriend. The truth is, no one can tell anyone is gay just by looking at them. No one truly knows unless you tell them.

    That doesn't stop people from stereotyping. though, or even just misreading people, but that is not something we can control, and i don't think staying out of social situations is the answer.

    i agree with Roaming Soul about being aware, at least, of the possible results of coming out. It does make you more vulnerable, and once you have done it, you cannot undo it. But going to a football game and socializing is not coming out, it's just being out and about.

    There was a guy at work about a year ago who was very naturally 'fem', and was very friendly with me. It really felt like he was flirting with me, which probably was a little wishful thinking on my part. As i got to know him better though, i saw he was the same with everyone, that he was just naturally more 'feminine' and what i took as "flirting" was how he acted with everyone. i even ended up asking at one point if he was gay, he told me "no,"and seemed mystified that i'd ask. We had a great discussion. We played tennis together and one day i saw him at the gym... where he introduced me to his girl friend lol. my point is, no one can tell just by looking, but people still judge base on their individual perception and assumption.