Balancing myself and my relationship

Hello smart, helpful, beautiful people! Who's feeling like offering a lost soul some sound counsel? Pull up a chair, hear my tale of woe...

Okay it's not really a tale of woe. I'm good. I'm just trying to do right by myself and the lovelies in my life and need some help. It's about my wife. Maybe it's a start of summer thing, but a year ago at this time was when my egg cracked and I began the process of coming out to myself and my wife. It's been a hard as nails year, but we got through, and we have some time to relax. We're both off for the summer, and the kids are in school for another week. Bliss.

She's been asking how I'm doing with my gender identity. The conversation finally happened where I officially levelled-up from "questioning" to...*drumroll*...transgender! She's being incredibly brave, but is having a very hard time nonetheless. What she wants is to be all for my transition. She wants to like the idea, but she does not. She's really upset with herself for not being the supportive wife of a transwoman that she feels that her identity demands.

But she's trying. This morning, I woke up to her beautiful face smiling at me. She started the day by telling me that whatever ways I want to experiment with gender expression, she'd like to participate and have fun with it. She wants to take me shopping this week. Awesome, right? I think so! I want to and mean to take her up on it. I'm nervous, but whatever. This will be awesome.

This is the part I need advice on. She's also telling me that she's a nervous wreck. Pretty serious anxiety. Some of it is work, I'm sure, but some of it is my gender. She's told me in no uncertain terms that she's in the process of accepting that I am going to transition. She's more convinced of it than I am, but it scares her a lot. I think these offers of have fun with gender expression with me are a way for her to safely dip her toes in the water and test her comfort levels.

I believe I've just proven the saying that no one asks for advice, they ask for permission. I'm looking for permission to accept my wife's permission to begin my gender transition, even though it's a great challenge for her to offer it. I will be mindful of her and her feelings. Patient and deliberate is how I want to approach this change anyway.